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November 18, 2017 at 4:54 pm #178609abiParticipant
Thank you for all your comments, I found most of the advice very comforting. I’ve never really entertained the idea of leaving him; it feels like he’s my entire world and without him I’d be miserable. I know there are other people out there for everyone, and even being single might be good for a while, but I want to know that I tried everything I could to fix us before I even began thinking about breaking up with him.
This week has been a particularly difficult one. I recognise that because I’m sad, I dwell more on what he’s done. At this point it feels like it’s my neurotic cycle that’s ruining our relationship – not him. He’s going to Nepal in just over a week, and I won’t see him until February. I want to talk to him about it, similar to the way I have done here – maybe writing a letter addressed to him and going over the points I’ve already mentioned. That way he can read it and remember it, and also it avoids and argument from me getting too angry by talking about it and shouting at him.
Still, I’m unsure. I want to know whether he’s over his ex or not before he goes to Nepal – while he’s out there it will be difficult to contact him, and without being able to speak about it I’m worried that my thoughts are just going to eat away at me for the three months he’s gone. However, I really don’t want to start another argument again, and we’ve had this conversation so many times it feels almost pointless. Should I write the letter, or just keep my thoughts to myself and hope that the time apart from each other will heal what he’s done in the past?
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