Dear Anita,

You asked, “Why would you not end the relationship if she only makes you miserable, if staying with her “only” makes you confused and depressed and stuck and so unhappy?”

I really don’t know. I know i should just cut the ties. But the feelings are holding me back. 12 years of being together. Today i went to my new house, and i saw the furniture that we chose,  the  kitchen that we designed, every little thing make me sad. We were so close to marriage. I feel horrible for leaving her, for making her sad. But in my head I’m aware, she made me this way.

Dear Poppyxo,

Thanks for taking time to read and reply. Yes i do agree with Anita too. You are right too. But it’s just hard to let go.

Thank you Anita for replying….

Well, they are Just simple little things like:

1) replying my messages (she often gone MIA for more than 7 hours, which is impossible cuz you have toilet break, lunch break and etc) yeah, nw she texts me, hourly.

2) don’t start shouting and crying whenever we are having discussion on our problem.(she said she can’t control it, this is her way and I’m being selfish  for asking her not to cry)

3) don’t get upset with me so easily (especially during her period). I have never seen her got angry with her friends. She got angry easily and told me that it’s uncontrollable. For example once my worktable was messy cuz i had to rush a project that night, and she complained to me about it. So i told her nicely that I’m busy, I’m in a rush, i got back home by 9pm and since you are home by 2pm,can’t you help me to tidy it. And tada, she’s upset and refused to talk to me the whole night.

4) setting me as her priority. Once i hurt my leg so bad and  i couldn’t drive and i asked her to come and get me. But she was having lunch with her friends and she can’t come immediately because to her it was rude to leave. So i ended waiting for almost 2 hours.

I could go on and on but i hope you get the gist.