Gracie,

It sounds to me like you’re experiencing several different emotions right now. Maybe a bit of anger because he lied to you about the lap dance, perhaps a bit of regret for not expressing how you really felt about him going to that strip club in the first place.

I can relate so much with your post for several reasons. I’m currently in a committed relationship and honestly, if i was in your position I probably would have done the same thing. I try not to restrict my boyfriend too much by being one of those overprotective girlfriends who have their boyfriends on lock-down, so I tend to give the go ahead when it comes to things like that (even if i’m not fully comfortable with it). I know this isn’t really a good thing since i’m compromising my own feelings in the process but i’m now working on striking that balance. I’m not sure if this was the same logic you had when you gave your fiance the go ahead.

The fact that he lied about the whole lap dance thing isn’t cool at all. For me, lying is a HUGE turn off and has been the source of several arguments that I’ve had with my bf.. but in your situation, I guess your fiance was put in a strange place since your best friend was also staring him down when you confronted him about it. He may have lied about it because it wasn’t something he wanted to discuss in front of your friend. He may have just panicked. I’m giving him the benefit of the doubt here.

All in all, it sounds like you’ve got yourself a wonderful man who loves and appreciates you. It also sounds to me that he’s truly sorry about all that happened. I know that you’re going through a lot at home because taking care of a sick person is no easy business. Despite all the hardships just remember that you’re truly blessed. I wish you so much happiness in this new chapter of life.