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my2cents

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  • April 15, 2016 at 8:11 pm in reply to: Post break-up Blues #101991
    my2cents
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    You’re welcome Bonni! Good for you for not responding to him!!!
    You have a good head on your shoulders and that will carry you far, my friend.
    Stay strong and keep smiling! Life is good.
    Many blessings to you!

    April 8, 2016 at 5:18 pm in reply to: Post break-up Blues #101329
    my2cents
    Participant

    Hi @cath, thanks for the shout out! Hang in there girl, the pain is only as long as you allow it.
    I also swear by the No Contact Rule, it not only stops the heartbreak hemorrhage immediately but also allows a chance for a possible future of you and your partner in case the timing just wasn’t right.
    Big hugs to you and many blessings as well!

    • This reply was modified 8 years, 7 months ago by my2cents.
    April 8, 2016 at 4:58 pm in reply to: Not Happy After My Breakup. Will he regret leaving for someone else? Please help #101325
    my2cents
    Participant

    Dear jcat,

    Please please please BLOCK ALL his texts and phone calls. It’s best you extend that NO CONTACT RULE FOREVER and also STOP LOOKING AT HIS SOCIAL MEDIA. It clearly hurts you whenever you have any type of contact with him (includes looking at his social media) so why do it? In time, the pain will be nothing and you will see that he wasn’t right for you.

    You say he smokes weed and gets drunk almost every week with his friends…looks way too thin…looks almost out of control, and “off” appearance about him…broke up with you 3 days after getting back from cruise trip together after being together for over 5 years…he said you two could be friends but he’s dating someone else…he was high on weed daily during your cruise…changed his profile pic after he said he wouldn’t change it when he was with you, etc. This is the person that you miss and love. Consider yourself lucky to be rid of him.

    As for all your questions, WHO THE HELL CARES if he still thinks of you or if he regrets what he did or if his new romance will last or if it’s only a rebound thing. You will only drive yourself insane trying to answer all these questions. Also, in a lot of cases, a person usually “checks out” of the relationship way before the relationship ends so he may have checked out way before your cruise but didn’t have the courage to say something until after the cruise.

    Take control and shift the focus onto yourself. You deserve to be happy. Granted you two have been together for over 5 years so you can’t just forget everything. Just remember you can’t make someone love you, like you or want to be with you.

    Picture this…imagine you’re on a small island and he’s standing in front of you. Tell him how much he’s hurt you. You can yell, cry and shout but don’t assault him. Then say goodbye. Thank him for the time you two shared and wish him the best. You can say it however you want. Then get into your canoe and row safely back to land.

    Take good care of yourself and love yourself. Many blessings to you!

    April 8, 2016 at 4:06 pm in reply to: Post break-up Blues #101321
    my2cents
    Participant

    Bonni, first of all, do NOT be so hard on yourself for not graduating on time. Forgive yourself for it is not easy to go through a painful breakup and you did the best you could at that time given the circumstances. Secondly, you should block ALL his text messages and phone calls. Do NOT respond to his calls or text messages. There is NO need for any contact with him.

    Someone that cares about you and respects you would not distance himself from you by moving to another city after being together for 5 years and then break up with you right before your finals. To me, that shows a lack of respect and commitment to you on his part.

    Take good care of yourself, be good to yourself and love yourself because you’re the only one that can do that.

    “You can search throughout the entire universe for someone who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, and that person is not to be found anywhere. You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love and affection.” -Buddha

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