Thanks so much Inky for the thoughts. At this point, our families and friends know. I thought at first it would be kept under wraps but my ex-fiance was pretty open telling our friend that he got a letter from the wife of the guy and so at that point, I reached out to our friends to express my side and my guilt/shame so they at least know how I feel. I feel like the woman IS crazy. This is actually her third time threatening to expose me and the reason why I’ve ignored her in the past was because 1) the other guy told me she was harmless and not to worry and 2) believe issues like this should be dealt between husband and wife. It’s scary that she found out my information but she lives across the country so I am not TOO worried that she’s going to kill me in my sleep…. Unfortunately I feel like I can’t use her as the basis of my apologies/offense because I understand this all would not have happened had I not made the “wrong” decision (I put in quotes because I’ve been told there is no such thing as wrong and right in life, just experiences).

Her letter was also at the worst timing possible. It was the day before our parents were supposed to meet and when I was supposed to say yes to the dress with my mother and mother-in-law. The next balance for the venue was also due. I’m agnostic but the timing here is uncanny. I cannot help but wonder if someone upstairs is sending a message here.

Re: #3, yes…. he is known to having a temper and doesn’t know how to forgive (perhaps this is a lesson for him to learn the act of forgiveness? i dont know…). He’s said he’s had temptations himself but he’s always remained strong and faithful. He did end up apologizing for the way he acted but said if it happened again, he knew he would’ve reacted the same way knowing he does have a temper.

Thank you for sharing the story of your old friend. I mean that is definitely tragic and reminded me that this wife also did threaten to tell my mom what a whore of a daughter I was. I hope your old friend’s parents were able to just ignore it and protect their daughter instead.