Anita, I can’t thank you enough for your well thought out rely. You drew parallels to my previous relationship to the one with my father. I have loved him unconditionally. I’ve defended him when no one else did and have enabled him. I woke up today and feel validated. It’s still very sad, and my heart still hurts but I know in time it will heal. Your message helped me immensely. Again, thank you so much. I feel very heard. ❤️❤️❤️

Thank you both Inky, and Anita. I had a very long talk with him this evening and I didn’t something that I’m not very good at doing, listening. I know I have to go with my gut and see things through. I’m going to be hopeful and work on my own resentments.

Hi Anita,

im sorry, what I wrote was confusing and I’m also using my cell phone. I feel like you train people how to treat you and every time I stay when he speaks to me in a disrespectful way I feel like I am saying “it’s ok to treat me this way” we’ve cried together and he admits he has problems. In all fairness I do, too. I don’t handle it well and react very poorly at times.. that always leaves me feeling very guilty. I love him very much and he does add value to my life. All my friends and family tell me to leave him, that I can do much better and that people never change. I don’t believe that.. people do change if they really want to, but how many chances should one give?