Dear Rich,

Your story has really touched me and I want to reach out to you.

Briefly, I too was unloved, unwanted as a child and treated badly.  I too internalised the message that I was unlovable.  I also trained to become a counsellor.  I was looking for some understanding and I was drawn to those who suffered.  And, would you believe I cycled – so hard!  I cycled up onto a nearby moorland and the act of cycling gave me a feeling of who I could be and the moorland I believe saved my life by being bleak and windy as heck and beautiful and there, for me.

My reason for wanting to speak with you is to ask what keeps you going?  Clearly this conversation here above is important in keeping you going.  And I wonder what else.  Maybe the opportunity your training is offering to reflect in a way your father doesn’t?  Your cycling…..  It is a question that has helped and continues to help me.  Because it reminds me about nature, about activity – using my body helps – about books which are so important to me.

I think what I want to say to you is you are not alone.  I join with the voices of those who hear you, see you.  Thank you for speaking

Merly