That’s correct. I’m from the US so with the internship I had just graduated college in Missouri, moved back home to Chicago briefly and then went out to California.

Once I returned from the internship I was without a job in the field I currently work in for 14 months. I worked in retail for some time during that time. It was hard not having a job and working retail and I often thought about graduate school versus a job and job won out. In Jan 2017 I got what amounts to a year long internship finishing the beginning of this year and then got the job I have now. Throughout that year and thus far at my job along with a number of existential life worries or stress I have the question of school vs job has came up and stressed me out. I think ultimately I don’t really enjoy what I do but I’m not sure what I enjoy doing.

but now with this job and “financial stability” I can move out and really begin to live life. Ultimately it’s time for me to sink or swim ultimately i guess. I think this recurring unhappiness and worry around career, job, purpose and moving out when I’m not very good at building relationships with people just has me really stressed.

i just recently been thinking that my younger brother is out of college taking one last go at playing baseball professionally which is his dream and ultimately wants to work doing sports related stuff. I don’t think I really have that love and passion for anything and I’m doing my job now cuz I have my degree in it and allows me to work on social justice issues. But I don’t enjoy communications at all. I also feel like every major decision like(going to grad school or quitting a job or whatever) is life or death with loan debt and having a job and making people proud and stuff. Sorry this was super long and rambling

Thanks so much Anita. Since I posted I texted with my aunt and briefly explained that I was worried about adjusting and of course she said it’s just like when you went away to college, I came to enjoy my time there and she said the same thing will happen with my new situation. I then talked to my mom and told her what my aunt said. I think I’m not giving myself time to adjust to something new I haven’t even been here long. I think I need to give myself time to adjust. I’m actually excited about my internship, the other things is what I was/am worried about as I said above. Furthermore, I actually somehow ended up talking with my roommate, who I officially met about 3 weeks ago and moved in Thursday as a room share( in her living room) I kind of went on about some of the things I was feeling and stuff and she listened and reassured me I’ll be fine, just need to adjust and that everything else(making friends, romantic stuff) will come. I also just Skyped my mom and that’s was great. I feel so much better than when I posted the message. A little leery of the “sadness and worry” feeling coming back. To answer your question dealing with homesickness, I kind of just got over it I feel like. But, I think God willing I will be ok. I’m fairly certain I’ll enjoy my internship and the other things will come. I also like how you said little by little I need to come out my comfort zone. My time where I’m at may be temporary and I’ll return home( at least to the area where my family lives) and I just need little growth in the temporary time I may have not huge leaps and bounds. Thanks again.

Marcus