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LunaParticipant
Hi Christie. I am not entirely sure why you feeling that way because i have never been through anything like that but i can comfort you. Im so sorry to hear, its must been like hell to loose someone you were dearly in love with..
What i think is, i think you was trying to ignore the fact that he is gone, deep down inside you said to yourself that you will be strong and over come this, try to think for what he did was right… But you denying the fact that he is already gone, you may think that you have accepted that fact but you’re probably not because you’re grieving now… Usually, the person whom holds it in, try to be strong in such a short time period is just in denial. I feel the same, as i just broke up with my ex too… and i still function normally but deep down inside I’m not even sure how i feel.
Sometimes its not even you, its a psychological state… because you were so in shock, your brain must have told you to forget about the situation to be able to cope with it, but however, you still acknowledge the situation and maybe it all comes back to you now. I think that could be right, because there is a few cases where… people lost someone they really love, and to be able to handle and cope with the situation, somehow they seems to forget about what happened and just continuing with life. Our human body is very smart and our brain is very powerful what it can do when it comes to coping. I hope you will feel better in time… Please, take care of yourself and focus in other things and keep reminding yourself that your love is now in a better place, he is no longer living in sorrow and pain. 🙁 Im really sorry to know… hope everything will get better for you.April 9, 2014 at 5:18 am in reply to: Im lost and completely hopeless after my brutal breakup. #54535LunaParticipantWell, this is also reason why i wanted you to ask her. Now you can see that she is a brutal bitch that don’t deserve you. You are way too good for her, please walk away.
Either with an explanation or without, you have an answer.
if she was to tell you why she broke up with you, what did you do wrong? Then you got the answer.
And even if she didn’t give you any explanation but calling you names, you still have the answer. The answer is, at least you tried for the explanation, so you don’t wonder to your self that should you ask or not? Because you already done it.
I just sympathise myself with people’s situation that is all. And i know, at a time like this.. you need all the support you can.
Now it’s time to move on, to realise better things in life. To believe there are angels looking after you that’s why you survived, higher power above knows you are a good person, your time hasn’t come yet so you cannot die? 🙂
and yes, love is blind. I feel yah… your case is not the worse, there are more complicated relationship problems out there that is so so hard to answer.. and i am in it 🙁 but i will be ok 😀
I suggest you Jay, to get a job, but don’t work too much.. give you sometimes to reflect on yourself too… Because, being at home too much will make you start thinking, making it harder to move on. Look up meditate and practice, i don’t ahaah because i don’t know how to, but maybe you can.
If you have hobbies, mines drawing… then practice it! If you have no hobbies, its time you should explore your talent and pick up a hobby 🙂 for men are usually Gym. Hit the gym, looking sexy and who cares about the bitches, some of them just waste your time 😀 ahhah!- This reply was modified 10 years, 7 months ago by Luna.
April 7, 2014 at 7:56 pm in reply to: Im lost and completely hopeless after my brutal breakup. #54456LunaParticipantChuck her shits away.
Don’t even think of keeping it away, what for. Your home have no place for girl like her. If she was a good person, maybe you should have some respect but honestly just dumped them in the bin. Nasty as it sounds, you don’t need any memory lingering around. The moment you throw her shits away, you making you another step to let the memory go.
And, be glad that everything happened. Because, if without all that. It could’ve been worse… you might love her even more, might move in together, live together or whatever together. Create more memories and making it harder for yourself. Imagine if you were to be married to a girl like her, then to find out all these years she have been cheating on you. She is such a heartless bitch, for her to walk away without even explain why she did what she did or even apologise. This girl is not worth your time, if you want to revenge. Jay, be the most successful person ever. Show the world that you are happy and thank you for that SLUT you now know your worth. Everything has its karma.
A girl that cheat on her boy friend, if the guy at her work really going to treat her well then he is a stupid man. One day, she will do the same to him.
But pray for her, show your forgiveness. A person like her that have no morals for herself, she lives a shit life and needs a lot of help.
Jay, you truly deserve all the best xxApril 7, 2014 at 7:44 pm in reply to: Im lost and completely hopeless after my brutal breakup. #54450LunaParticipantHi Jayaseelan.
Please don’t give up n your self.
Look, the reason why you could not move on, you feel like hell everyday because it was all good.. You treated her like a princess and still, she hurt you like that. Ok, this is why you can’t move on.
_You’re confused..
_You keep thinking of all the effort you’ve made for her, how could she treated you this way. You asking yourself again and again the same question.. what have i done wrong?
_You didn’t get any comfort from her, no reassurance, no respect.. You want to at least an apology from her.
_You lingering on the memory because you were the happiest man ever being with this girl.
_You want an explanation from her, why did she treat you that way, why did she cheat and stuff.
Look Jay, if its the other way to move on, is to have all those questions to be answered… then do it. Sometimes, people can’t move on because they have no explanation why things did not work out…They need a real answer, something sounds right to be able to accept the situation then move on.
Jay, don’t think of suicide again. When you love again, make sure.. you don’t live for that person, make sure you don’t do anything in your life because of that person… Such, get a job because of her. NO! you need to get job for yourself Jay?? Why would you do that because of her? THAT IS WEAK! and don’r be weak… Are you a man?
Don’t live for a girl, you live for yourself, to make yourself happy and the person that comes into your life meant to share your world and her world together with you… DONT FORGET ABOUT YOURSELF when you are with someone else. Most importantly, don’t give your all to them.. Because, why? You are you, you will love her, be the best boy friend ever.. but don’t forget about yourself, don’t live for anyone. Live for you.
Im going through a break up too, and i also feel lost and confuse and have no motivation but i have to tell myself… what am i doing to myself? I was the happiest girl ever.
Think about your future Jay… You are only 27, you have so many years ahead to be a successful person, live a good life and deserve all the best.
Once you accomplish all that, your self esteem will BOOST! When you have a self esteem, you will attract ladies that likes you for how confident you are.
You ex girl friend obviously looked down on you, she knows your weakness… She knows she can move on and come back to you any time and you would be ok with that.
She has no respect for you, she cheated on you with for a better man. Someone that is probably making her feel like, she gotta play game with him, gotta chase him also… Woman enjoy the chase too, not just only men.. But you gave her your all at the start.
This is what happened to me, being too genuine, but my ex wasn’t a heartless person. We didn’t work out because i need a boy friend that is a man, not a little boy.
You gotta know what you want in life Jay.. I would like to talk to you more.
Please don’t give up on yourself, don’t ever think of committing suicide because of a girl who treated you like shit.
Jay, you don’t understand what a good life is yet, don’t waste this life… you have to live until you know what is happiness then you can die happy. Right now, sorry man. Life is precious, don’t just give up that easily…
Everyday, please go for a walk outside.. Breathe in and breathe out. notice things around you, there are beautiful things that is around you. The grass, the sky… everything! They’re so peaceful, and then you.. you’re with them. Don’t rely on anyone to bring you up, you gotta get up yourself Jay.
The moment you rely on anyone, you will get used to the habit and feel hopeless again.. But don’t bottle it, tell people how you feel get comfort then knowing that, people loves you Jay.
I dont ono you man, but you’re a great person. You have a lot of potential and you are not weak. You just let your emotion taking over.. act upon your head, not emotion. That bitch your ex, is not worthy for you to even think about seriously.
NO ONE is allow to disrespect you that way!
EVER!
Ok? Im happy to reply to you anytime.- This reply was modified 10 years, 7 months ago by Luna.
LunaParticipantHi there.
I really think what your mother said kinda inked in your brain that you will be alone. But you are not, please don’t think that way.
What you think of who you are, you will become that person. If you read things about the consciousness mind, you are not aware of it but what you think about yourself will turn you into one. Just like little children, if someone’s mother talked to her husband that their child has some kind of mental disorder.. now, if the child was to hear that, it will grow up thinking it has some sort of problem. Children believe in everything adults say…. don’t take that in, you will not be alone and will never be. Just love yourself and appreciate the job you have, the people around you.
Be kind, but when you know they only treating you like a second choice, please leave. You treat people right, and don’t expect anything from return but at least a genuine friendship. Value yourself.
I am an introvert, sometimes i have trouble communicate to people because all i do is thinking while they’re talking so i hear nothing. But i can be extrovert too, i am bait of both… But trust me, you’re very smart to even notice of things like that… i think it means that you’re an emotional type like me 🙂 I get along with people very easy, they feel comfortable around me but i don’t feel comfortable around them because when i meet someone.. i automatically build a wall to not let them get close to me, you might have that trust issue like me too 🙂 Don’t worry… we are still learning and developing 😀 You’ll soon meet those who genuinely appreciate you for who your are soon!LunaParticipantThat was beautiful Chad, i actually cared about my last relationship that i did all that. Everyday i was constantly thinking of what to do, why is he like this.? How can i help him? i should accept him the way he is, support him even when he was being an asshole me and he would realise how much of a mature person i am. I know he feels sad because he’s not stupid, he’s one of those guy that knows who is bad and who is good, even til the end he said.. he will always love me as a friend til the very end, will never forget who i am as a person, he really did love everything about me. We just couldn’t fall in love thats why we broke up, it was sad.
We thought we was perfect together. I was so open with him, communicate by being nice instead of insulting him. I know, how to be nice to get what i want. And i do, but one thing that i made me cannot give in anymore.. he can’t seem to love me, there is no spark. So i begins to love myself instead. After all, what I’ve learnt is how to communicate with stubborn people, made me a better person.
Btw, your ex and you…
No relationship is a failure. Now you know, pick a girl that would communicate her heart to you. 🙂
Its not an easy thing to do, it was really hard for me too. 🙂
Thankyou for the beautiful thoughts. A lot people really need to know that, don’t be nasty.. be nice and maybe you’ll get what you want.
This is what i tell myself.
Do good and be so good that when you leave, all they know of you was how great the person you are.
Be so good to that person that, when you leave. All they rmb was that beautiful person they was honour to have met. 🙂LunaParticipantand btw, i noticed you said your boy friend never proud of you or make you feel proud. I understand.. little things like that, shows so much… Facebook we knows its just a media, but it shows if your man is so proud of you by wanting to show you to the whole world..? My ex never posted photos of me, only once. When i always.
It was a boring relationship and at the start i thought it was magical because i wished for someone exactly like him, but something you wished for.. had everything you wanted but not everything you need from a man.
Do you feel like you respect yourself being with him? Because when i was with this man.. i put all my ego aside. I let him being so mean to me then came back every time saying he is wrong.
I believed my ex was a good person too…
just some people, have less experience… they probably don’t even know what is love.
Are you willing to wait..?
Poor you… 🙁
Its so important for a woman to feel special, to know if their partner is proud and happy with them. Im so sad to know, i hope…. you can find a way to work that out. Believe and trust in what you feel inside… only you what to do, and trust me whatever happens.. theres a time and you will be ready for it, or you’ll feel it. I never thought i could leave him either, the thought of u breaking up was killing me and him. All we wished for was to fall in love, he just can’t love me.. and i can’t love someone who don’t love me.
I wish you all the best and just learn to love yourself first, don’t think about him too much.
Be selfish for once, and care about yourself… only you, are your only best friend.- This reply was modified 10 years, 7 months ago by Luna.
LunaParticipantHi Ugren. Believe me or not, you are not alone. I completely understand how you are feeling.
Now, your boy friend and my ex are similar in a way that they are both fking weird. 🙂 Mind my language, i can’t find a way to express what a weirdo he is.
I recently just to out of relationship with him. I was like you, i was a woman that has pride in her self, happy with her life and know what she wants.
But when i met my ex, i thought it was something miracle… i thought maybe this is the one, he seems like he was perfect. But despite from all those positive thoughts, del down inside… on our first date, i didn’t feel a spark. I thought i loved him, i did… but it was more like a mother love her son or a best friend.
My ex admired me for the person i am. The past relationships i would never think for how my exes would feel, i cared but i was selfish but with this guy.. i gave him my all.
i didn’t think my relationship with him was normal either.
He said, he only love me like a best friend despite how much he loves my personality, he just couldn’t open up. He couldn’t love me, he never feel the spark either.
One thing is, his dad… is an introvert, when i called someone weird… I’m being serious, they’re one of a kind. You would never meet, such…. awkward person. I guess, he is kinda weird like his dad. So maybe, you boy friend is kinda the same..? Anyways, what I’m trying to explain is… i think i can feel your pain, its not easy… it’s one of those SO SO SO COMPLICATED relationship. You keep trying because you love everything about them but you can thane what you need.
All i wanted was my ex to love me and care for me like a normal boy friend would… I keep telling him the same and the same thing again, after a year of constant arguing break up and he hurt me so so so much. I think I’m a good looking girl, but the way he treated me.. he made me feel so ugly, unappreciated and don’t feel special at all.
I lost myself because of him and I’m slowly healing and trying to find myself back.
Please understand this, this is one in a life time you meet someone like that. A good relationship shouldn’t be too hard, shouldn’t be too easy either.. but if its SO SO SO HARD like that. Do you want to put your life at risk being with someone who making you feel that way..?
Do you want to settle for someone like that?
I know how hard it is… it took me forever, i was a dead girl being with him, he drained my energy and my life, i believe i was already gone even when i was with him because he hurt me that much. But we keep trying, say one more time.. one more time maybe it would work.
Now, if it would work… it would work along time ago, since i feel like you putting so much effort into it.. we are alike, iwas like you. Went on internet asking for advice and no one will ever understand this special connection.
Feel like he’s your soul mate but we know deep down in your heart, how he is… is not what you want in a man!
You want to be love… by a man. 🙁
Someone who makes you feel secure and not doubting on the relationship like that.
It took me so much courage, to completely cut him out of my life. Don’t see him, don’t talk to him..
Believe me, its so hard… but please do, what will make you happy in a long term, not because what you feel now is blind from what you think.
I even be open to him, ask him for support and what should he do if he’s angry or whatever. Pretty much, I am basically tell him how to act like a mature person would, dealing with situation in a way that will support me instead of letting me down. I’ve done everything i could.
You miss, deserve so much better….
I believe each day you be thinking why and why, how can i make him love me? what can i do and all these questions..
If being with him makes you feel that way, i think you should fall in love with yourself.
So sad to hear, i hope… you understand what i mean, i came out from a strange relationship… that i shared my world with, the only one person who understand me so much to only be let down. I don’t want you, to feel the same and don’t waste your time and youth…
Just take in what i say that is all, sorry to put in so much opinion..
But, it is really hard to be with someone like that.
If a man really want a future with you, he will introduce you to his family and i can be sure of that..
If you haven’t ask him to support you when you are so down. Be a man that will hold his woman, not hurting his woman.
And if he can’t do that for you, i mean… what a point having a man. 🙁
Would you want to be treated this way for the rest of your life…? Will you give up your happiness to be with this man..? that was the question i asked myself and i answered. no i love myself more. I gave it all, and enough is enough.- This reply was modified 10 years, 7 months ago by Luna.
LunaParticipantHi Sage.
There always time in your life when you feel so confuse and lost, don’t know what to do and live being worry..
feeling lost and have no passion for anything is definitely one of the worse feeling. Perhaps, you’ve been thinking about your age and feeling time is limited? I mean, its easy to say but hard to do. But 26 and turning 27 is still young 🙂
Maybe travelling might help you find your passion? Who knows? you might come across something from over sea and thought, wow that was a brilliant idea and bring the idea to your country? Or you might like helping people while you are exploring at the same time?
Maybe where you living is not a right place for you to find your passion?
Do you have any hobbies at all? What is meaningful to you? I have many passion such as drawing, decorating, sewing, singing dancing cooking and whatever else. i am just a creative dreamy butterfly… But i never wanted to turn my passion into a job, although a lot people say you should turn your passion into job.
I rather think, what is meaningful for me… and decide to take a job that is related to it.
Such as, if you’re a spiritual person believe in higher power and what not.. You can be a yoga instructor or a mediation teacher, mean while start the massage business on the side. Need a job you love at least..
If you love children and they means something to you, you can be a midwife, you can be a kinder garden teacher, baby sitter etc…
if you love music, and video editing… please practice and never stop promoting yourself… who know you might com across someone appreciate your work? Don’t ever doubt on yourself if you really love that and wan to follow, hopes create positivity and law of attraction say, anything you believe, you will make it happen.. but its important of how much you want that badly?
Being famous is not a bless, sometimes… you would have no privacy in life, popularity won’t make you feel peaceful..
Get out of your comfort zone, try something do something and take risks. Learn new things, if you keep being in denial that you are 27 and have no passion, how can you find a passion if you haven’t try it in the first place..? 🙂
So even if nothing happen, you learn.. and you know you’ve tried what you could.
you sound very bored of things the way it is, you need to get out there and explore. And don’t worry about your age, age is just a number.
At the end of the day… you did what made you happy, explore life and fulfil your experience, understand yourself more, i think that is your job, to make yourself happy.LunaParticipantI hope love will heal you, love yourself <3 Goodluck!
LunaParticipant@JasmineJasmine thankyou so much, i really appreciate you compliments. Much love 🙂
LunaParticipantoops i thought you would be a guy for some reason 🙂 But it works both ways, guys or girls both have their pride and ego but mostly men i say. 🙂 Goodluck 🙂
LunaParticipantHi there.
What a terrible past.. Im so sorry to hear, it makes me hurt for you.
i don’t want to put in my opinion what you should do or how you should do, but this question i know, you won’t even know how to answer. WHY ARE YOU BACK WITH HER MAN?? she treated you so bad…
i don’t know how you treat her, or how she treats you… She is nothing but an old lady now and realised she can’t find anyone better than you.
You are not even happy…
You feel betrayed, not once… but many times. I understand the fact that you love her so much, no one ever made you feel this way. But after her, did you ever open up to any other girls? Did you ever once let your past go and let a right person help you through or you only treat them wrong because you were hurt of your past. I hope the way i talk don’t offend you, but you man.. you deserve so much better.
Love is blind, and when you put in so much effort… done everything perfectly right, you have a business, a boy friend material you were to her, yet she still cheated on you.
That’s her problemmm… its not yours.
You know the reason why you always love and still love her, you already said it.
It is because, you don’t understand how she could do that to you? You pretty much kneel on your knee wanting her love and to be faithful and she still did what she did. You only lingering because you are so confuse. It hurts you so much because you know you did so much for her, and you did’t achieve what you want. Because you were fighting for something that never love you like you did to her. You keep coming back to prove yourself that you can save this love, because you love her so so much. And it killed you because you did not achieve it. You feel like you failed for something you longing for.
You are a business man, i assume…. business man enjoy the chase and challenge, she is a challenge to you, and also a chase. And even til now she is.
But thats a point, another point is.. she’s not just someone, she’s someone who made you feel like any other girls could. But you never gave any other girls a chance… you are so hurt, you are so damaged and your heart is numb to the point where you destroyed your own moral..
ts a curse to meet a woman when you have something in your hand, it is more guarantee when you meet someone and have nothing..
She comes to you, when you’re rich, and left you for a richer man, and then one after another and you once rescue her again.
I can admire your love for her…
But it is so important to have some self respect to leave, for her to leave you and you would still come back to her every single times… Female gets bored of that, she takes you for granted…And you decided to be with this lady. Please take meditation classes, do some yoga and believe in forgiveness.. The only way you can go through this is to forgive her, if she treats you good now. Just appreciate every little things that she is doing for you for what she have never done for you before. You finally get what you want from her and be happy with that. If you are with her, you have to let go of the past or you will forever be unhappy and hating your life. Love yourself and show her that only you can provide her what she wants and need. Think for her, for her sins and action, she did what she did because she did not know any better, thats why she did what she did to you ok? If you can forgive her, everything will be fine.
Im so sorry to hear. I hope, maybe you realise something.. and maybe can use my advice and sorry about all my opinion. But you do need to know all that to forgive her. She must have a past to made her become that way, no one ever grow up to hurt anyone. We were born to love not to hate.- This reply was modified 10 years, 7 months ago by Luna.
LunaParticipantHi there, i’ve never been in your position but i a few times, i do feel that way..
What i suggest is. Just be confident as you are, everyone knows that you had an accident. Be calm, and enjoy the sport.. don’t think too much about what others may think of you.
If it really bother you, why don’t you go ahead and ask/confront them how you feel? “.. am i being too slow? am i dragging you guys down..?”
The reason why your friend did not feel the same way even if she comes last, because it is true that men do have lots of pride and ego. Let go of that, maybe you would enjoy the activity more?
If you care about your pride, people will notice that… if you don’t, they won’t feel it. Its how you feel that spread the vibes.
Just relax, just do what you do and don’t think!
And don’t assume, that they thinks you’re dragging them down, don’t assume, don’t think too much, just enjoy the game. It is just a game, it’s not a competition 🙂
I hope, this may help you more or less. Goodluck with the game 🙂- This reply was modified 10 years, 7 months ago by Luna.
LunaParticipantHi Jess, i am new to tinybuddha but i’ve seen you commented around, you’re a very experienced woman.
Im also going to share my tips to happiness too.
Latey, I’ve been feeling down because of a recent break up… It would make me think again and again why it did not work, but we gave it too many times that now it is an obvious answer why it did not work. Anyways, what i did was …
Sometimes, when you are sad. Just smile, stand up start jumping…
If things you can’t change, worrying or thinking about it benefits us nothing…
and what comes will come. And whatever going to come, it is will turn out right.. because i trust myself, and my instinct, i know what i want and the reason why i want it so i hope, we all understand ourselves enough, we will make the right decision.
Also, i do little things as you do too…
such as
_Money management
_Future goals, short term/ long term
_Go for a walk at random times, or make effort to wake up early to see sunrise or wait for sunset.
_ Do some drawing, now this is if you love drawing, or do whatever what your hobbies is.
_ Learning something new! Its so rewarding and productive, download a language app, i downloaded doulingo, and busuu for french and german. i have an iPhone
_ Go around the neighbour hood, go to the park, bring your scissor…go for wild flowers hunting, and put them in a jar!! I just did mine today 🙂
http://i325.photobucket.com/albums/k391/lunamimi10/1795482_1419479824977357_509464450_n_zps57778d9b.jpg
http://i325.photobucket.com/albums/k391/lunamimi10/10003059_1410305952561411_519696261_n_zps39071ec1.jpg
Always be creative! decorate your room? clean your house? go to the library and borrow a book? go to the a quiet park and read the book?
Theres so many things to do 🙂
I hope this would help everyone to create a day full of things to do! -
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