Hi Lisa,

My apologies for  my late response. When I’m not feeling ok it’s hard for me to post on a public forum or maybe to communicate my thought at all. I know my mind goes out of control a little bit and I’m thinking of a 100 things all at ones. I hope you don’t mind I’ll respond a little later.

Lucy

Lisa,

Thank you for your response. It makes me really happy to hear someone say, even though they are experiencing pain, ‘I never want to stop trying, stop learning, stop growing…’. It makes me feel more determent to keep trying.

I respect your choice to just keep posting on a public forum. You shouldn’t do things you are not comfortable with.

For me, concentration and breath are really difficult. A few weeks ago we were experimenting with mantra’s in my yoga class (breathing in 6 sec. and out 6 sec on Ohm namah shivaya). This really triggers me in a negative way. Even though I don’t respond to other music in this way. It makes me feel really angry (I think because it reminds me of people who say that love fixes everything, don’t step in to try and help (a child) and just keep meditating). My feelings are so overwhelming that my heartbeat goes up really fast and I need to quit the exercise. Because I find it difficult I think it is important to keep trying. But I don’t know how. Do you have any experience with this? What do you do when your emotions are getting to much.

I saw a few of your other posts. I sounds like you are trying to change yourself to find a man, is that the right interpretation? I tend to go that direction myself because it’s easier for me to change myself for someone else. Personally I think I (and others) should work on being myself, being happy, doing all kind of things that make me feel good (with or without a man). I think that when your happy you can attract the right kind of people. People who love you for you, and you make that possible by being yourself. Maybe that sounds stupid because until now It didn’t get me a husband but for me it also feels that, at this point in my life, I can’t be really myself all the time (and be confident about it).

Hi Lisa,

First my apologies, I’m trying to send you a private message but I don’t know if this is one.

I have not read all of your post since there are 10 pages of them (incl. the reactions on your post) and I didn’t want my massage to be focused on all of the details.

I think we came from a really different background but I have a feeling I can relate to your problem. I grow up very isolated and in a unfriendly environment. I also have some problems with feeling lonely. Of course I can’t blame anyone because I am a adult now and responsible for all my own actions. Just as you in the past (and even now) my first priority was a roof above my head and paying the bills (and staying in school). I’m trying to make more connections but as all things in life there are a lot of setbacks. I don’t feel like a negative person. I have so many interests and thing that I love but sometimes feelings overwhelm me. I’m trying to find a way to deal with these emotions/feelings because I strongly believe If I’m able to sett aside by anxieties things will work out. I’ve been practicing yoga and meditation for 2 years now and I would love to find someone with whom I can share experiences with regarding the mental aspects yoga and mediation to help myself grow and learn.

I’m not sure what I want to ask or say to you but something in your message triggered a emotion in me. I don’t know how I can help you but it would mean a lot to me to have some to share experiences with and get some advise from.

Lucy