Hey Cheyenne,

I really like Chad’s advice and experience that he shared with you.

I would just add, wherever you go for school, you can always speak with a academic counsellor and they can likely help you get a sense of what you might be interested and give you suggestions on what to take in terms of classes, so at least you get a taste/feel of what you might want to study. I’ve had people that I’ve gone to school with start off in one major and graduate with a completely different major. That’s the beauty of school. You usually have a set curriculum of courses for a major and they generally arrange it so you can pick some electives to take that have absolutely nothing to do with you. Sometimes you don’t even have to take mandatory courses that particular year and swap it with an elective. You can probably even request to talk to an upper year student and get a perspective from them about courses/majors.

Hope that helps.

Lucia

Hi cathi,

Sounds like you don’t have much confidence in yourself. I used to think those same thoughts too. But don’t forget every one has a different level of connection with other people. You may be closer to one friend than another. If you’re ever feeling lonely, call up a friend and ask to hang out. I don’t always hang out with a group of friends, sometimes it’s fun-er and feeling a deeper connection with a friend when it is one-to-one.

Hope that helps.

Lucia

Hi Stuck,

As Jeroen’s end message says: Actions speak louder than words. Instead of telling him, show him. It’s kind of hard to know where to start when you ask your partner for a list of things they don’t like about you. How about asking for a list of things that he does like about you? That can kind of remind him of the reasons why he is in a relationship with you.

Like a lot of the messages on TB: you can’t control other people’s actions or reactions, but you sure can control your own. My advice would be start making the positive changes for yourself, it will trickle into your other relationships – both romantic or platonic.

Hope you find your answers.

Lucia

Hey GB,

The Ruminant and Emma have given you such great insight and advice. I would suggest try volunteering at different agencies/events, you get a taste of the industry of that agency, and you’ll meet different people there who might be able to give you insight about the careers in that industry. In other words, go out there and try different things. Like Emma and the Ruminant said, you don’t have to stick with what you study in school. In fact, a lot of people finish school and don’t even work in the area they studied for. School prepares you for thinking critically, and you can take those skills anywhere.

I think whatever you end up doing, you’ll be great! 🙂

Hi Mary,

I’m sorry to hear that you are feeling really hurt. It really takes time for the pain to lessen. Even though you share mutual friends, you mentioned that you’ve made new ones. How about you try connecting with those friends over the holidays? Start making your own plans and focus on yourself. Don’t worry about your ex and his new gf, I know easier said than done, but truly focus on you. With time, you will start feeling way better. Go do something fun, something you enjoy! Keep meeting new people, you never know who you’ll meet. 🙂

Hope this helps.

Lucia

Hi S,

No you don’t have to be friendless to be happy. Just be patient with yourself and with your friends who are trying to help you out. Sometimes friends are trying to give you well-meaning advice and can go on a rant about what not to do. You’re still grieving for loss. And that’s ok. We all experience things differently and we definitely aren’t machines where we can turn off our emotions with a click of a button. It’s definitely not easy trying to manage all aspects of our lives at once. Just work on each piece as best you can.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with being alone. It’s great to have me-time! That’s the best time to find out what your passions are, do stuff you like to do and grow. But it’s also really great to hang out with like-minded individuals, especially those who are supportive. I dunno, maybe you want to look into a support group to help with talking stuff out? I’ve never been to one, but I figured they may be a bit more gentle in terms of giving advice?

Just keep working on you and be the best you that you can be. 🙂

Lucia

1. I’m a pretty loyal friend. I love meeting new people. Sporty! I love to play sports!
2. A website called TinyDevotions. Then i think stumble upon a few times.
3. Practically everything! Little kids, my brother and my mom in particular.
4. BC – there is so much to show, can’t just choose one! I love it there!!!!!
5. EVERYTHING! I love to learn! If I had all the time in the world, I would take classes all the time!!!! Right now, I dream of moonlighting as a mechanic.