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Lada

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Viewing 9 posts - 1 through 9 (of 9 total)
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  • #118010
    Lada
    Participant

    Hello Anita,

    you can pour yourself a glass of wine, I’ve moved into my own place (well, I have 5 other roommates, but they’re all young students). Things have been better though still hectic. I’ve dealt with school stuff, work (I changed my job), translating as a freelancer, money.. So I’m excited for the time everything settles down a bit. I’m glad to go to my old house once a week but eventually me and mom wil get into an argument about something so I’m always happy to leave as well. I was afraid to tell her the news, we had some huge fights in September. But I got her into thinking that I was staying at my boyfriend’s and after a week I told her the truth.

    How have you been?

    • This reply was modified 8 years, 1 month ago by Lada.
    #110369
    Lada
    Participant

    I agree with you that I can’t live with my mother anymore. The thing is that even in Prague I’m noticing these voices that are so ingrained in my head, voices of criticism and other stuff. I hope they melt away one day.

    #110324
    Lada
    Participant

    Helloo, Anita 🙂

    I’m writing you from Prague and I don’t know if I even have anything to write about :)) My job at the camp is great, I have good access to the city and a lot of free time. Things with my boyfriend are great and I have been getting some translating jobs recently. We have been lightly discussing starting a business but I don’t think it’s a good idea to work with my partner.

    I went to my therapist and I really had nothing to tell him, but he was quite enthusiastic about the race in Europe so we talked about that for a long time :)) Then I told him that my mother could be mentally exhausted because she takes care of our grandfather and he suggested that maybe that’s where all her care and love go to and there is nothing left of it for me.

    So I’m translating, looking for a flat, preparing for the race.. 🙂 I sometimes look back at the bad times and I can’t believe that I recovered like this. Thank God for the pills..

    How are you doing?

    • This reply was modified 8 years, 4 months ago by Lada.
    #109282
    Lada
    Participant

    Or maybe I’m not scared of the future but scared of autumn and winter, this period wasn’t good for me the last few years..

    #109281
    Lada
    Participant

    Hi, Anita

    Just wanted to let you know how I’ve been doing and ask you the same! 🙂

    I just came back from a week-long holiday with my mum, we were both relaxed so we got along quite well. I took some trips and went to a concert in Prague so I wasn’t always with her. I’m learning not to be so affected by what she says and I strongly believe that I’ll have moved out by September.

    As for the next weeks, I’ll be working for three weeks in Prague in a summer camp with my friend (1 hour from home) and sleep there as well, and then we will set out on a 10-day-long race during which we will visit several countries in Europe on a very low budget. So that makes it a month away from home 🙂

    I’m supposed to come back to school in October and I’m still little anxious about that because I don’t what caused my depression and if it was school, I don’t want it to happen again.

    Other than that I’m really okay and enjoy being with my friends and getting in touch with my relatives, reading, finding new hobbies.. I don’t know what will happen after summer and it scares me a bit, but that’s life 🙂

    How are you?

    #107913
    Lada
    Participant

    Hi, Anita, thank you so much for asking.

    Things have been great. Though I’m still looking for a new job, but I don’t take night shifts at my current job and rest from time to time. I’m still living at home, there are days when I get along with mum well (especially if we don’t see each other for a few days), but there are also days when we disagree on everything, it’s tiring. On the other hand, I’m currently seeing someone so I’m not at home that much, I have also been going out with friends whom I have been neglecting the past few months.

    What I realized is that family issues have quite a big impact on me. In the past year, my grandpa almost died, then simultaneously my uncle and his son were both in serious condition (my uncle died from cancer, I was with him that night, my cousin is okay now). I’m always upset that I can’t do more for then, but in general I never realized that these things may have been the cause, I thought it was either school, men, father, … The truth is that when someone in my family got sick, I would drop everything. Unfortunately my aunt is sick as well now, I’m coming there to stay with her a few days.

    brievuong: Hello, thank you for your words. I was severely depressed, I was going crazy at times a few months back. My mind just went on and on and on, creating only horrible scenarios.. I guess it’s good that I’m self-aware, but what my therapist noticed is that I analyze too much. He said to me now to just tell him how I feel or felt and not look for the cause of it, because I tend to interlink events that in the end have nothing to do with each other. So I’m actually learning not to analyze everything so much, it’s just thoughts 🙂

    • This reply was modified 8 years, 5 months ago by Lada.
    • This reply was modified 8 years, 5 months ago by Lada.
    #106895
    Lada
    Participant

    I guess you’re righz, it’s been a long time since she last asked me how I was. It’s all just “can you tell me when you’re going to start acting like an adult”, “when will you get normal again”, “I know, just get better already”. It’s just that these are people I live with and I wish they cared.. well, I know they do care, but they don’t feel the need to show it I guess.. What surprised me was when my mum said that we don’t seem to love her. After the divorce, I said to myself that it was from that moment my job to make her happy, as I saw her completely broken, and I did everything to make her happy. When I told her that, she said something like “really?”. I do wish that I lived with some good friends but I don’t feel like making such a big move right now as I said. Maybe the au-pair thing would show me the way.

    #106888
    Lada
    Participant

    And how are you doing? 🙂

    #106887
    Lada
    Participant

    Btw I’ve written an e-mail to my American professor (a strict one, a lot of students fear him) as well and I got such a nice e-mail back, he really does care about me and offered me help whenever I need it. It really made my day 🙂

Viewing 9 posts - 1 through 9 (of 9 total)