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Kavetha SundaramoorthyParticipant@ Kathy: I’m glad you found the post helpful Kathy. Yes, guilt is such a burden to the bearer and colors our perception of life itself. I have yet not had a child myself and am the eldest child for my parents….so I can somewhat relate to the guilt of not “doing what you are supposed to” in reproducing. Hugs.
@ traveler: I think persuing liberation/freedom is what each of us aspires to, but is easier said that done.
Also, I’m not sure if ego causes guilt…to be honest, I think its the super ego (which is absorbed from our upbringing) that adds to feelings of guilt…just my 2 cents 🙂
For folks who have not had a chance to listen to Brene Brown, she is awesome speaker and an expert on shame,guilt and vulnerability. Check out her TED talk: http://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability.html
Best,
Kavetha
Kavetha SundaramoorthyParticipantHi Sheila,
Yes it’s totally awesome that eastern wisdom and mindfulness is fianlly being validated by research now 🙂
What do you do Sheila? This forum is so cool that I get to meet lots of like minded people! Yay!
Thanks for the good luck wishes!
-Kavetha
Kavetha SundaramoorthyParticipantHi Angela,
I can relate to what you are going through and I thank you for trusting me enough to reach out. I ahve a few questions for you:
1) I would ask your psychiatrist to make sure he/she has looked into possible medical causes of depression (thyroid, vitamin B 12 and D levels etc;)
2) I would look into therapy that could explore what has changed in your life circumstances. Each decade brings certain challenges and responsibilites and joys. Exploring where you are in this journey may help.
3) Mindfulness is very useful technique to precent relapses, and studies have shown it does even better than antidepressents in thsi regard. However, do not stop your meds now, as a combination approach is bestwhen your depression feels as high as a 7/10.
4) To start, I would set aside just 10 mins a day, and connect it to another habit you already have established. Such as your morning coffee or as soon as you take a shower etc; Establishing a daily habit is most important in the beginning (than how long or how deep you meditate).
5) In terms of type of meditation, I would start with just keeping your awareness on your breath. Focus on one area of the body where you can best feel your breath, such as your abdomen or your nostrils, and keep your awareness in that spot, focuing on the sensation of the breath going in and out. When your mind wanders (which it will, thats what minds do), just gently and compassionately bring it back to your breath. Here is a link for a follow along breathing mindfulness : http://marc.ucla.edu/body.cfm?id=22
Don’t get distracted by all the other resources available on this website. Just stick with breathing and try to develope daily habit of just 10 mins for now.
6) I will be releasing a new e-book on my website in the next 1-2 days about MBCT. It’s totally free. Hopefully it will help give some more context to mindfulness for depression. It also has audio excercises by me that you can follow along to.
Take good care of yourself and do things for yourself that you would do for a loved one who is depressed.
Hugs,
Kavetha
Kavetha SundaramoorthyParticipantHi Kathy and Edit,
Thank you for such thought provoking doscussion on guilt. A subject I have always been fascinated by.
I think of guilt as regret with a poisoned dart. That is pointed inwards. Although it is wonderful to use regret as a way of assessing what could have been done better, guilt doesnt leave room for any reason or compassion, it feels too final and like a death sentence. Every person should have their next breath be a new change at change, including yourself. And guilt, in my opinion, dosnt allow for that.
More over, guilt is one of the tops signs of clinical depression, and has been linked to attempted suicides. Thanks for starting this important and often neglcted topic Kathy.
I’ve also written a post on how to deal with guilt. Here is the link if you are interested: http://talk-doctor.com/how-to-survive-and-heal-from-guilt/
Sending you both love,
Kavetha
Kavetha SundaramoorthyParticipantHello all,
Thanks to each of you for these awesome tips. I’m somewhat new to blogging, having began a few months old and it’s thusfar been an interesitng journey. Couple of things that I have learnt:
1) Even if your topic/niche is crowded, you can still succeed, as long as you have a unique persepctive and an authentic voice.
2) Try to help peaople in real life with your skills and do the best job you possibly can. Real life testimonials (even better if they are via video) on your website make a huge impact.
3) HARO is a useful resource (Help A Reporter Out). They post several enquries daily on varied topics from well known media sources. If you can add something of value, you could get quoted in a widely read media source. It adds to your online authority.
4) As Marissa and Molly said, don’t write when you feel you “should”, but ratehr when something moves you. Be on the look out for such stuff in your daily life and keep and note pad (or use your phone) to jot down these thoughts as they occur. For e.g: A few days ago, I spent hours staring at the computer screen, then gave up and went to watch a movie a with a friend. The movie topic inspired me so much that I was up until 1 am writing a post 🙂
5) Learn basic copy writing skills (I’ve found copyblogger and problogger to be amazing resources).
6) Follow the mantra of “Give, give and give some more”: the returns will then come naturally.
Best,
Kavetha
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Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours. It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine. 