After a breakup allot of people, usually the dumped, still has hope it will all work out.

Or people are in pain and try to get over their ex-loved one.

No-Contact rule is a great solution for both scenarios. Even when you have hope, you doubt the outcome will be what you have been dreaming about all this time. But your also moving on.

By the time the NC rule is over, you’ll be a completely different person. Able to see what you really want, not clouded by heavy emotions like 90 days earlier.

NC makes moving on, and loosing hope better to handle.
Its not easy, most certaintly not. But its something allot of people get strength from. Which is exactly what they need in their time of pain and sorrow.

Just saying. When he insisted on you telling how many guys you talk to, he was not checking what he was up against. He was checking what kind of girl you are. ‘Nice try, but i got 5 more people trying. Try better’.

Well, every person has their basic ideal of a relationship. Things they ‘want’ or ‘require’ in a relationship. When your together for two years, she must have realised one of those ‘requirements’ fell short in the relationship. Isnt there anything she may have mentioned over the last two years, things she would like differently? I dont believe that after two years you just fall out of love. You realise something is missing. A person can’t end a relationship after one weekend of doubting. Something has been on her mind a lot longer.

“She’s one of these people that makes her mind up then locks everything away in a box, never to be seen again.’

My ex was exactly like that. She had this confidence that was so beautiful but daunting. When she was figuring out something herself and she had a conclusion, she would be totally convinced. And nobody could her change her mind.
I kind of admire that, but i hate it aswell because its all over now.

Your girlfriend left you quite quickly. All of the sudden everything changed. I think you deserve some answers. Not knowing is the worst part of it all. If all you ‘had’/’have’ mend anything to her, she should give you at least the reason of breaking up.

but that is just my two cents.

You could roll over and ‘give’ him what he wants, but you just laying there is not what he wants.
He wants the intimacy. You laying there and him doing his thing isn’t attractive at all. What you gave him is
an opportunity to loose his ‘pressure’ and go to sleep. He can do that on his own when you are not around.
He wants it to be you, and him. I think he just struggles emotionally. Doubting the fact if the fire is still present between you two.

You can say i love you, but for me personally, the intimacy is very important.
You need to give him some assurance that you’re really working on what your saying your working on.

I made that mistake myself and lost the girl of my life. She came to me with a problem. I Listened to her, and said i would put more effort in solving the problem. And it was all ‘good’ after. (They never forget!!) Then the next day i would work on the problem, maybe a little bit on the day after that. but then i just forgot about it.

Basically what im trying to say is, then you talk the talk, walk the walk.
You cant have a successful relationship without listening. Sometimes it takes a little work, sometimes it takes a lot of work. Practice what you preach, do in deeds what you claim in words.

I hope this helps.

Greetings.

• This reply was modified 10 years, 3 months ago by Jeroen.