Hi all, thanks for the replies. Just to update. My husband and I got into a stupid fight over no nothing around 3 weeks ago. Think I criticised him driving too fast. He snapped and went into meltdown mode. Said once again ” this isn’t going to work” we are too different… We are delaying the inevitable. I’m worried we will just split in a few years anyway. I cried and screamed and begged him to stay. On the
Floor in a total mess. Kept saying if you loved me u would stay. He still left. Said we are too different and it’s over. Packed his stuff and went to his mums. Called a few hours later and said he was sorry and could he come back, I said no. Said he hurt me so much and carried through with my biggest fear…. Said I needed space. He was gone for two weeks, we met and didn’t know how to proceed. Talked things through. He said he does worry we are too different. He does love me but didn’t know what to do. Listed all the things I did that annoyed him or he couldn’t tolerate, we cried we hugged. Awful. So sad. Discussed lack of sex and intimacy… I said do u desire me, he said yes and knows we haven’t had sex in months but we’ve let it slip away and now it’s awkward. Said there’s nothing on a conscious level… I don’t buy it. He’s been back two weeks and still no emotional or physical intimacy…. Actions speak louder than words.
He’s back now and I said I’m not happy and he hurt me so much by leaving after knowing is his threats to leave affect me. Said I need to see how things go…. I’m not happy . Since then he’s being super lovely but pretending all is fine. We are in the ‘up’ cycle til the next meltdown…. Worries me. Still no emotional or physical intimacy….

And yes the other man is still on the scene wanting me to give things a try with him but I know I must get to grips with my marriage first…
🙁

All so hard
Struggling so much
Feel so low.