Charlotte,

You are obviously a very caring and loving person and you deserve to be loved as such. Having been through situations such as yours many years ago I would agree with many people posting here, your friend wants the best of both worlds and is hurting you in the process. “perhaps this is just the way we get along, I really enjoy being with you and can never lose you”-If that were true she would be faithful to you which is what you deserve, but she has chosen not to do that.

I think you instinctively know this and limiting/ending contact with this person is the only way you can heal and move forward. That will allow your heart to be open to a healthy love and not the part-time affections you are getting now. It is hard at first but worth it in the long run as I gratefully found out.

Jim

Jeff, I went through the same process of losing a 24 year marriage after my wife decided she did not want to be married. This occurred 3 years ago and while there is still pain time has provided healing, growth and yes, the start of hope. That is not available to you know, and I know how miserable it was to sign those papers. Take care of yourself, be kind to yourself and do not give up. Life is too much of a gift for all of us, even if I can’t always see that.

Jim