“That good feeling you had then, the feeling you want back, I think it was the product of that time, the relief you needed then, the relief you needed from what was. The greater our distress, the greater our need for relief. You had lots of distress then, and your brain took care of the need, providing you great relief, calm.”

Hi Anita,

I understand what you are saying and thank you for your reply but that feeling was always there, it wasn’t a product of that time when I was going through stress with my mother, it wasn’t something I was using to get relief, it was always there UNTIL that time, until I had to pour everything into looking after her and then subsequently studying and then working at my career.

To make things clearer, it was always there as a child, as a teen, as someone in their early 20’s up until the point where I started focusing on material wealth and my career. Then I just slowly lost it. I want it back.

Hi E

I am starting counseling next Thursday. I have found someone who matches me and am looking forward to talking in depth about everything. I have not heard of the Dark night of the Soul no but I will look into that thank you.

Thanks again both
James