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Helcat

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Viewing 15 posts - 601 through 615 (of 974 total)
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  • in reply to: Relationship that wasnt a relationship gone wrong #406593
    Helcat
    Participant

    Hi Alecsee

    I’m glad that things have improved. However, I’m curious what your plans are moving forward? It sounds like she plans on dating both of you. Are you okay with that? Or are you going to give her a timeframe to make a decision?

    Wishing you all the best! 🙏

    in reply to: Zhuan Falun (Turning The Law Wheel) #406585
    Helcat
    Participant

    Don’t many religions including Christianity, Judaism and Islam condemn homosexuality?

    It’s not particularly unusual. Whilst personally, I disagree with that. I feel like it’s inappropriate to attempt to discredit anyones spiritual practices or religion.

    in reply to: Any tips in how to solve communication problems? #406580
    Helcat
    Participant

    I think it’s important to remember that when someone communicates and things seem a little off, the reason could be completely unrelated to you.

    Sometimes people are busy with work. Sometimes they’re dealing with other stressful circumstances.

    Your interaction sounds fairly normal. Try to put you as a potential factor for any hesitancy in communication out of your mind.

    in reply to: Any tips in how to solve communication problems? #406579
    Helcat
    Participant

    Hi Eric

    I don’t see a problem with asking if a mooncake is homemade or what flavour it is. I expect that those questions would be asked all the time.

    This seems much worse to you because of your anxiety and fear of judgement. So the problem isn’t really what happened. It is important to understand that your anxiety is the cause of your fears and take steps to reduce your anxiety. I would suggest going to the gym. Try not to worry and when you are feeling better make some plans for what to say when you pick up the moon cake.

    in reply to: Zhuan Falun (Turning The Law Wheel) #406486
    Helcat
    Participant

    Hi T.K!

    That book is from the spiritual practice of Falun Gong which was created in 1992 and is based on Buddhism.

    I’m glad you’re enjoying it!

    Helcat
    Participant

    Hi Ivygrl!

    You made a mistake but learning from it is the most important thing that you can do. Please do not stress yourself about it.

    I understand what it is like to be poor. There are alternatives to stealing though. You could go to a library and borrow books for free legally or download e-books to read.

    If you have an impulse and know that it is wrong but you don’t know how to figure out a solution yourself I would recommend asking an adult about it.

    From a moral perspective, I wonder what was the donated money for? What was the school planning on spending it on?

    Thinking that you would be happy and that no one would notice is where you misunderstood the consequence.  When money is stolen, it will always generally be noticed.

    The following potential consequences of stealing $60 are not to scare you. They are just to help you understand.

    For children, if committed on school grounds it is up to the school if they wish to press charges. There is a prison for children that commit crimes called juvenile detention. But I think most schools would probably opt for a longer suspension. Repeating this behaviour may face expulsion or prosecution.

    For adults in America, they can be jailed for up to a year and potentially fined for $1000 as well. Another impact of this crime, is that it can be hard to find a job afterwards.

    If you work hard to understand consequences for various issues you face by asking lots of questions. I think you will find that as you learn you start to make better choices and people will not feel the need to remind you of previous mistakes.

    Wishing you all the best! 🙏

    in reply to: Lost and losing hope #406410
    Helcat
    Participant

    Hi Anonymouscat

    International travel has been possible for a while now, it is just expensive. Is expense a factor that has been preventing visits?

    It can be really difficult to manage long distance relationships unless there is enough money to travel.

    in reply to: Need Help with IBS: It’s stressing me out!!!! #406380
    Helcat
    Participant

    Hi Madalina

    I can tell that you are trying really hard to manage your diet in a healthy way.

    I tried various diets, it’s been a bit of a journey lol. I totally empathise with how difficult it is.

    Low fodmap, GERD, low glycemic index, dairy free and gluten free are all diets that I’ve tried. I think it has been helpful to find out which foods don’t seem to get on well with me.

    I don’t seem to have problems with meat. I tend to err on the low fat side, avoiding fried foods etc. Like you I don’t get on well with dairy. Cauliflower and acidic foods don’t sit well either. I found that I have difficulty digesting very dry foods. So if I do eat a little of them I have to drink tea to help digest it. The hot and warm liquid helps to rehydrate it.

    The western diet can include a ridiculous amount of wheat. I found that I’m able to tolerate it in smaller amounts. I try and vary the carbohydrate source in a day. Rice, oats, quinoa that type of thing.

    I don’t get on well with artificial sweeteners either. Dark chocolate and fruit have become my new best friends. Water intake has been important too. I had a habit of not drinking enough especially when anxious.

    Mental health drugs can impact digestion and food cravings too. It is challenging to manage.

    in reply to: Need Help with IBS: It’s stressing me out!!!! #406376
    Helcat
    Participant

    Hi Madalina

    I used to have IBS, whilst of course, stress can be a factor. I found diet was a large component for me. My symptoms have largely resolved after dietary changes. As you noticed, the hormones before and at the start of your period are a trigger for IBS too.

    Have you tried any of the diets that are recommended to help IBS yet?

    in reply to: Please help me, I deserve to be judged #406375
    Helcat
    Participant

    Hi Stargazer

    I’m truly sorry that you were treat that way by a long term member. It’s completely inappropriate.

    in reply to: Catching repressed emotions early enough #406354
    Helcat
    Participant

    Hi Bob!

    It sounds like you’re doing some good work. That you’re willing to confront these emotions speaks for itself.

    I find that emotions and thoughts are linked. If you know of the topic that the emotion is linked to it can be easier to root out. When I’m avoiding my emotions, I find that acknowledging the cause is helpful. Then I comfort myself and tell myself it is okay to feel this way.

    I hope this helps!

    I have some additional thoughts on the topic of letting emotions go. Buddhism has some interesting ideas about it.

    One recommendation that I found helpful was to focus on the feeling and sensations of emotions in the body and relax. Their belief is that only the original thought linked to the emotion matters. Rumination aka any thoughts following are considered to be unimportant, not useful or even false.

    I’m curious to hear your thoughts.

    in reply to: Please help me, I deserve to be judged #406350
    Helcat
    Participant

    Hi Anita

    Do you have any evidence that this is the same person? You are making a lot of harsh accusations.

    Helcat
    Participant

    Hi Ivy!

    Lovely to see you again! Judgement free zone here.

    Can I ask why you stole $60 at school? What did you think would happen?

    Something for you to think over… What do you think happens as an adult in the outside world if you steal money?

    I think people constantly remind you of things because you don’t seem to understand consequences. They actually went really easy on you because of your conditions.

    Perhaps they don’t think you’re the worst person ever? Perhaps they are just afraid that you will do something that you don’t really understand the consequences of. You are quickly becoming an adult and adults are not given the same benefit of doubt that children are. In society, adults can be harshly punished for behaviours that are accepted as children. I can understand why they are afraid for you. They want you to have a safe and happy life.

    I remember that you showed me a rough draft and it was very charming. I think practicing as you have been works well. To me, you already know how to make a good story so just keep at it!

    in reply to: Why have I been extremely unlucky with respect to myself? #406341
    Helcat
    Participant

    *surgery

    in reply to: Why have I been extremely unlucky with respect to myself? #406340
    Helcat
    Participant

    Hi Zaredkhan

    I’m sorry to hear that you hurt your leg (I hope it gets better soon), your father was mean to you, you had computer troubles and you are having difficulties with studying for your exam. It’s a lot to happen in a short space of time .

    The following I’m saying not to compare our difficulties. But to acknowledge that this is the reality of what life is like.

    I’m in a similar situation to you. Studying for an exam. At the same time my sister has gone into homeless accommodation (I am her carer), there have been issues with her supported accommodation and we are trying to set up a care plan for her, my supervisor had to take leave because of an emergency (I will be covering her classes) and I have to trek to a hospital for scans to decide whether I’ll finally be allowed surery for long term health issues.

    It is a blessing when there are calm periods in life, but more often than not as adults we face regular challenges. The trick is developing ourselves, so that we are functional and able to cope with challenges occurring.

    It sounds like you have a lot of good techniques and practices already and medication to help. I hope that with each issue in life you tackle, you get stronger and feel more confident in your ability to handle challenges in the future.

    Are there any times where you feel calmer?

Viewing 15 posts - 601 through 615 (of 974 total)