Hi Rob

The Buddhist perspective is interesting. I’m not sure if you’ve come across it in your studies.

During the process of death and rebirth there is an opportunity to choose which realm you are born into. There are 6 realms, yet only the human realm provides the opportunity for enlightenment and to end the cycle of rebirth. I remember a story about a Buddha that was able to predict how many rebirths it would take individuals to attain this.

I like the idea that we are all here to learn.

Wishing you all the best 🙏

Hi Palesunnidays

It’s good that one less thing is off your plate, but you are still handling a lot. I’m glad that you’re finding an exercise routine helpful.

It might help you to practice setting boundaries and saying no. You are a helpful kind person. But you deserve to be happy. If you say no sometimes, you will still be helpful and kind. You will just be taking care of yourself as well as others and be happier as a result.

I’m sorry to hear that you had a lonely Christmas. No wonder you sought comfort. I can understand having emotions come up after sleeping with someone. It certainly doesn’t help that the temporary relationship seems unbalanced. Everything shouldn’t be on his terms. You are an extremely busy lady and need advanced notice. I wouldn’t be happy with the lack of communication since either. It’s rude.

You could probably find a new partner easily if you wanted to. I’m curious how dating has been going since your divorce? Do you find that you have been stuck in the friends with benefits / casual temporary relationship category with men?

Hi Palegazesunnidays

I’m sorry to hear about your difficulties with your father’s breakdown. It sounds like you yhandling (pardon my French) a hell of a lot at the moment. You’re supporting your mom, dad brother, your children as well as your friend’s daughter. Perhaps you should plan how to scale back some of your responsibilities? If at all possible?

You have to put on your own oxygen mask before you can help others. It sounds like you might be feeling overwhelmed with everything. Do you think that’s accurate? Do you have difficulty saying no to people and find it hard to press your own needs?

Regarding A. You’re an adult and it’s 2023. I don’t think anyone needs to feel guilty about these things. You deserve some human contact and comfort with everything you are dealing with right now. You might want to have a conversation with A about any boundaries you would like in this temporary relationship. I think it’s okay if you want to enjoy this situation, but only if you do find yourself enjoying it. If you don’t, it might be time to discuss that too.

Hi Eric

Happy new year!

I suggested preparing something special for your girlfriend. Action alleviates anxiety because you know you are doing your very best. Accept that your decision was simply to ride out the anxiety that this celebration brings. Perhaps do something to distract yourself?

Hi Rob

I’m glad that you’ve found liberation in Buddhism. Gratitude for the positive, acceptance of the negative and being. It’s all we can ask for.

I had a similar experience recently with meditation. I realised that thoughts are just stories we tell ourselves repeatedly and it was time for me to put some of those stories away.

Do I exist? As much as anyone else.

It’s unique because we are made up of our experiences and the people we have spent time with. We also have our own unique natures and gifts. At any point different people think of you in different ways with their own nature reflected in their ideas.

I do think there are very limited choices though. Our actions. If we don’t like something we can change. We learn and we grow. Although I’ve seen enough of life to have experienced some ludicrous circumstances with ridiculous odds.

Hi SereneWolf!

It’s great that you have a healthy routine of meditation and walking. How are you finding meditation? I found it tough when I started a couple of years ago.

I also walk every day and meditate for 15 minutes twice a day. I like to do a 15 minute stretch routine I found on YouTube too. I find that all of these practices help to manage pain.

I’m being very careful with what I’m eating because I’ve been having stomach issues. I noticed that emotional difficulties pop up when I’m having difficulty digesting. The mind / body connection is very interesting!

I find that keeping a gratitude journal helps with my mental health. Before evening meditation I try and list a few small good things that happened during the day. This helps me sleep and develops a positive attitude.

Hi Lily

I’m sorry to hear that you’re struggling with this.

I’m curious why you both broke up the first time? Was it a surprise to you?

Do you trust your partner? I think there’s a difference between him seeing other people when you’re broken up and him cheating on you. Are you worried that he’s cheated on you?

Why do you need the details of who he slept with when you weren’t in a relationship at the time?