Hi Peter

The esoteric nature is what I love about the text too. I find that re-reading it over the years I always learn something new. Each time I’m a little older, a little wiser and see something I couldn’t see before.

The quote you mentioned reminded me of another text. This time a Buddhist one. I don’t remember the name. It actually contained curses. It was forbidden to share it because it could trigger enlightenment. It was reserved only for a select few. At the same time, it foresaw that many would be unable to understand it. Therefore sharing it would invite misfortune.

Amazingly somehow it found it’s way onto the internet translated into many languages!

My husband always says that if we were meant for enlightenment we would have been born monks.

Instead we have been given different lives and different challenges.

Wishing you all the best! 🙏

Hi Shaydee!

I’m glad that talking to your girlfriend brought you closer together. It sounds like she has her own anxieties too. It’s good that you reassured her. It tells me that a) she cares about your relationship b) she’s under a lot of stress c) she trusts you enough to express her concerns d) she may have had bad experiences in other relationships. I hope as the stress calms down things will get easier for you both.

Another way to think about being vulnerable is about being authentic. Sure, you’re not relying on an image anymore. But being authentic gives people the chance to love you wholly for who you are. Surely this is better than only a small piece of you being loved and being too afraid to share more than that with others. Every single person has weaknesses. The question is how brave people are in being open about them. Of course there is a time and a place. You don’t have to share all of you with everyone. But it’s nice to be able to be with loved ones wholly.

Wishing you both all the best! 🙏 Proud of you for having some healthy conversations.

Hi Mae

I’m sorry to hear about your struggles.

The reason your boyfriend stated sound like a cop out. I can’t imagine why anyone would leave over their partner taking their medication? I don’t really understand the reading deadlines either. It sucks, but it sounds like you dodged a bullet with that one.

It’s awful that you were rejected from your PhD program and are experiencing difficulty gaining employment in your field. I’m not sure what the field is or how many job are available in that area.

Job hunting does suck though. It took me a year to get a suitable entry level job. I’ve even seen experienced people have similar difficulties. Certain industries are being hit hard at the moment.

I found it really depressing how many candidates were applying for each role. Applying felt like a lottery ticket with a small chance of getting a job at the end. Targeting my resume to roles helped. Some only needed small changes. I also volunteered to gain relevant work experience related to my field.

Are you getting any interviews as a result of your applications? If you are it’s a good sign. If you’re not there might be issues with your resume.

You’ve been through so much in the past year! I hope that things change for you and something good comes your way soon. Hang in there! Unfortunately, job hunting is a numbers game.

How are you feeling emotionally? And how are you coping with your limited budget? I hope you’re getting enough to eat and such.

Wishing you all the best! 🙏

Hi Tom!

It’s good to hear that your family are supportive in giving you your space when you need it. It’s lovely to her that your wife is a good honest person with a kind heart.

The thing about people in general is that they tend to take on traits of people that they spend time with. We’re all kind of a mish mash of experiences we’ve shared with other people.

The good thing is that values change over time and what is important to someone who is younger can be dramatically different when they get older. Simply by remembering the lessons you teach them, watching you being responsible, hardworking and caring for others. One day they may understand the importance of it even though they might not understand it now.

It sounds like you are worried about them. The good qualities that you have are important for survival in this world. Perhaps it’s not so much not seeing the good, but concern and a touch of frustration at times? Which is understandable!

Hi Tim

Not eating and sleeping does a real number on your ability to regulate emotion. It makes sense why the breakdown happened. It’s a very human reaction to intense stress. It sounds like you were already under a lot of stress before the break up happened. It tipped you over the edge as it were. You were not your usual self. I think you can safely say that.

You’ve got a good head on your shoulders and great attitude. I think your instincts that holding onto hope isn’t healthy for you shows a lot of self-awareness.

I hope things continue to get a little easier day by day.

Hi Sammie

I’m so sorry to hear about your miscarriage as well as the ex boyfriend who treat you so badly. You didn’t deserve any of his treatment. You deserve so much better!

It sounds like you’re doing all of the right things dating. Bear in mind that these things do take time.

I can understand how much it sucks to be alone while he is potentially seeing other people. It might be important for you to take some time to heal from this situation because there are a lot of not so good guys out there and if you can’t set boundaries and protect yourself  you could end up in a bad situation again.

Wishing you all the best! 🙏

Hi Tim

You need to forgive yourself for that. What happened was so unexpected and sudden. You were in shock and not in a good place. People do make mistakes when they’re under huge amounts of stress. You sound like an incredibly caring guy. I’m sure she remembers that is who you are.

I hope that like you, she can see the good that you had in your relationship and not define what you both had by the end of it. Like you said, she was hurting. It sounds like she was struggling more than you realised at the time.

Perhaps this is the answer to what happened? Simply that she couldn’t cope with all of the stress and whatever was going on internally?