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September 18, 2014 at 6:18 am #65153TinaParticipant
Hey there 🙂
For a long answer there’s a great book that helped me a lot: Feel the fear and do it anyway. The first thing is realising that the fear just won’t go away until you do it. If you sit there waiting to not be afraid you’ll wait forever. The good news is that it’s ok to be afraid, it doesn’t have to hold you back, you can be afraid and still do stuff. I’d say that everyone is afraid of change.
The next thing that helped me a lot is realising that you’re afraid of something that doesn’t exist. It’s just some fantasy and you just won’t know until you try. So even if the worst case scenario happens and you totally hate it, at least you will know and you won’t sit there forever wondering “what if..?”. A friend told me a great thing that I hold onto: “I trust my future self to deal with it.” It can also help to have a plan B prepared for the worst case; this could be as easy as asking your parents if you could come back for a few weeks if things fail or find a friend that would have you for a short while. It doesn’t mean you’ll be stuck there forever!
So all this could help you to feel a bit better but the fear will probably still be there. So there comes the (for me) most important thing: do things one step at a time. You’re already focussing on the future way too much; instead you could do tiny little steps that bring you closer to your goal, like just looking for a new place or a new job. Maybe drive to a place where you’d like to live and have a stroll and imagine living there already. Anything that’s not too scary. Even if you apply for jobs and turn up for interviews it doesn’t mean that you have to take the new job if you don’t want to, so there’s no reason not to try 😉 And I’m sure chances are very good you won’t regret it, even if your worst case happens. Because first: you’ll know why you didn’t like it (no what-if’s anymore) and second you’ll know that you did it once so it gets easier to do it again.Hope this helps, all the best 🙂
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