How do you learn to like someone that you have never liked for your entire life?

Place all your concentration on positive attributes about that person. Even if it means observing negative things that they don’t do (how they could be worse). If there are certain things that they say that bother you, learn to accept it: instead of focusing on how they bother you, find a distraction. Breathe and let go of the tension you feel when they say or do something that you don’t like.

How do you find beauty in something you have always though was ugly?

Learn more about. Dive into the facts. Foster interest in it. Try to see that thing as part of the larger picture of life. Understand that the world would not be the same without it.

How do you change the fabric of your being (as my self loathe feels to me)?

I don’t think it’s really a matter of changing the fabric of your being – that is something that is relatively inflexible and steady. Your soul has no attributes. It simply IS. By practicing living in the present moment, you can try to shift your focus away from your inner feelings and out to the senses of your perception – sight, taste, touch, smell, etc. In the observation – devoid of judgement – you can find solace.

Hope this helps.