Hi Anita, Pink, and Wind. Thank you so much for the respond. It helps me to see things more clearly.

I have a lot of up and down, when I am happy usually I don’t go to forum and ask for help. That’s why you only see me once a while when I feel down, and sad.

It was two different guys, I chatted with them at the same time. One told me about bitcoin, and another is like lottery app investment. I know that I am so stupid, I keep blaming myself how can I easily trust someone with their words. My uncle told me, it is not because of stupidity, but because they are professional scammers, they already know how to lie, persuade, manipulate, people. And I keep feeling sad.

I know it is my fault as well, I was too naive, I thought everyone is good in this world. I never meet with evil people, even around me people can be annoying or disagree with me, but I never meet with someone who are trully very evil like robbers, scammers, killers, etc. People around me are usually good people, nice, and treat me well. Even when I travels, usually people out of nowhere help me. This incident made me realise people can be very evil, and I was very shock, and cried a lot.

I didn’t know whether I should work harder, tried to make money on the side to pay all my debt. Or should I just give it up, meditate, and let my salary pay everything within time. I have tried both, but I keep feel sad most of the time.

Btw, thank you so much for accompany me and hear my stories. I know it is my fault, I just want to find ways to be strong and successful again. Also, to forgive myself… and learn the lesson. Thank you.

Hi Anita,
Thanks for your reply. Yes, I am totally confused when thinking on should I stay or should I move. The frustation happen when I have to explain simple thing like we have to move to digital instead of using traditional way, or why I need the password access to the website to do my work. Previously I was getting blamed by a colleague because the website is down, when I tried to explain and I am correct. The supervisor of that colleague, protecting him and asked me to drop that matter to be “professional”. I was upset because how can you don’t take responsibility and blaming people like that.

I am okay now, I have good friends here. But I am afraid that all that kind of misunderstanding, explaining basic things, etc. Happened again. So there are some opportunity opening in banks and my colleague asked me to apply together. We are waiting for interview. But I am not sure because I am afraid of risk in corporation like “slow-pace, corporate politics, long-hours etc.”

What do you think? Should I stay or jump? Thank You 🙂

Hi Anita and Anoniem,

Thank You for the reply. Yes, I am trying to improve my people skills right now. But I do also believe it really depends on the company culture and environment you are working in. So instead of me keep going crazy by thinking how do I remain positive around people who always rushing me to get what they want and feel like get “unhappy”. I decided to just let it go for the remaining times. As I don’t want to care so much whether they are blaming me, etc. anymore, since I am going to leave, no matter what. I only hope I can be peaceful and comforting with myself in the remaining time. And find a great job that appreciate my occupation more soon.

Hi Anoniem,

I understand your feeling with uncertainty, as I am in the same position now, but I believe it will soon change. However the word “CHANGE” can only be happen if we are trying, if it doesn’t work try again, if it is stressful try again, as you keep trying you also find your mistake and try to improve it. Treat it as a self education, real-life experience education. I am also very stressful and uncertain sometimes, but if the heart (and your head) already know something is wrong, staying longer without purpose has no meaning either. Don’t quit your job now, but never lose hope, think what interest you, and what dream job that you want. You are courageous person, the fact that you are asking for advice means you are trying to do something. I believe in you and hope you all the best.

Thank You Anita. I think I’ve too much expectation for myself. Reading your reply makes me understand to stay calm and not expect quick clarity straight away.

I have been very fortunate for everything I do right now, I just realise I keep looking up without realizing how far I have walked.

Thank You Again, I will try to keep exploring and contributing in my life.

Doremi 😀

Hi Anita,

Thank You for your reply. The feeling of unfulfilled has been around for quite sometimes, but I don’t know what to do with it. I know that I can’t quit my job because I have no plan whatsoever. I started making blog, writing articles, giving knowledge for free. One and two people respond it with interest, “Great Post”, “Good Work”. But that’s it. I don’t know what’s next on how should I monetize it or make it something I really become passionate about.

On the other hand, I remember when I was a child I immersed myself to read a lot of comic books, such as manga, disney, etc. Everything that full of illustration and stories. After I grow up, I went overseas and found a digital illustration book belong to my friend, totally captivated by it. I am not perfect, but I when I did my own illustration, I won award, admiration, etc.
However, that path of being illustrator comic book is totally out of the line with my current work. I am a web designer now.

So again, I am very stress. I want to join big company such as google, facebook, etc. so that I have bigger experience, financial freedom, feeling more respected and acknowledged, etc. That’s my parent’s dream as well. But on the other hand, I am very worried, worried that I am stuck in my life. Can I actually do something? My purpose in life…

Thank You Anita 🙂

Thank You So Much Adam, Jonathan, Nida!

All replies give me a lot of perspective to think of. Maybe I was very naive at the start and people see me young and don’t know the real thing. However, I’ve raised this concern to my head department (cried), he said mine one is already high compare to my peers same level. But I think he forget my skill is different with people who the same age with me, I don’t mean to become arrogant. But I learn very hard to have a lot of skill and I hope people appreciates it.

Thank You so much for the guidance, I will see what happen 😀

All the best,
Doremi