I feel like I wrote what you wrote! You are not alone. Every day I struggle with guilt feeling like I’m not happy with my husband and yearning for my “soulmate” friend of 17 yrs. I feel guilt bc I feel my husband deserves better than a confused wife that feels disconnected. My husband is similar sounding to yours. He doesn’t feel any need to grow and change. Lives status quo. I am always learning, growing, etc. I need a challenge in my relationship. But it’s not who my husband is. I feel I don’t love him unconditionally. I feel stuck too. I try to have faith and seek God. But my gut feelings keep pointing me towards the other guy. We stopped chatting ( me and soulmate), but I think of him all the time, still!