Anita,

My friend actually told me last night that he sent his sister a very pointed email that basically said that he cannot do this anymore and that he will not be responding to any emails or calls in the future, that he wishes her luck in the future, etc. He made that decision on his own, without me, so that took a lot of weight off my shoulders, phewww. Hopefully everything is resolved now. He said that he appreciates that I told him what I saw on her Instagram account because otherwise he might have fallen for her lies again. I still feel kind of bad, but I think that is maybe mostly because it is a sad situation. I’ve never really had to deal with manipulative family members or friends, so this was all unfamiliar to me, and I didn’t really know how to best help my friend.

Thank you so much for your help again, Anita. You are such a good person to dedicate your time here like you do, and you are so wise and have such good advice. If you haven’t already, you should write a book 🙂

Hi everyone,

Just wanted to update you all on the situation. Sorry it took me a while to post back – there was a lot of back and forth, and I wanted to wait until things resolved somewhat. I started out with Eris’ suggestions and figured that I would see how he reacted to that first, i.e. “well, in my experience, what I think made me a stronger person….” etc. He reacted well to that and kept asking me more questions, so eventually I segwayed into Anita’s suggestions. I explained that I have been concerned about the way he was being treated and that he seemed to feel very hurt and stressed and burnt out, and that this is not how a healthy relationship should feel. He also appreciated that a lot. He agreed that he felt that he was being used and degraded. He eventually confronted his sister about it and she freaked out. She wouldn’t talk to him for a week. Then she apologized a week later and acted really sweet for a few days. Then she started acting crazy again – making fun of him, cursing out his Dad and other family members, etc. He finally said that he had had enough and needed a break, and she told him to “have a nice life.” He was pretty upset for a while because he finally had a chance to know his sister, and it ended up being a bad experience, but he is ok now. He said that, without a doubt, he was only able to get through it because of me being there for him. Thank you for all of your help!