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May 25, 2018 at 1:01 am #209305CarpeDiemParticipant
Harmilap
I feel your pain. I was madly in love with my ex gf. I had a hope for one year that we might be together post our break up.
Last week I got to know that she is dating a guy I know. I am going through envy, jealous and heart ache. I have decided to leave this city in order to help me move on but I started some healthy habits a while ago which I know if I continue, I will be better in future1) I am trying to accept the reality that is the present
2) I am trying not to take things too personally3) I meditate ( I have been doing this on and off for last 45 days and I will trying to keep it for good in my schedule)
4) I pray for everyone, even those who hurt me5) I wake up early in order to get things done
5 years in a long time to think about someone. Did you date anyone in the meantime?
February 16, 2018 at 10:17 am #192865CarpeDiemParticipantHey guys
thanks for replying
I will try to meditate again and I will check links too. At this moment, I will try anything to heal properly. 🙂February 15, 2018 at 9:27 am #192689CarpeDiemParticipantI will try this and hope it works for me.
I did meditation before and I know it helps but sometimes I do not give the meditation its importance into my routine.
I think it is a bit of everything which is not going like I want, I think about it a bit too much than I should..But thanks a lot for your suggestion, I will give it a try for sure.
February 15, 2018 at 9:17 am #192685CarpeDiemParticipantGuys sorry for not replying
I believe I was always a bit over sensitive than a usual person and definitely an over thinker. The reason why I say it now is because I am having obsessive thoughts and dreams about my ex. Even though I started working part time and try to be busy in various activities but I still keep on thinking about her. We are not in touch regularly but rarely but even still I keep thinking about her mostly all the time. I am not able to let go…its been almost one year that we broke up. I am just not able to find a solace anywhere.February 10, 2018 at 5:33 am #191755CarpeDiemParticipantHey Matt
Can I ask how old are you?
Yes, I believe that being physically fit might help you to be stronger but being emotional is a different thing. Do you have any close friends with whom you can confide anything?February 10, 2018 at 5:25 am #191753CarpeDiemParticipantI am trying to overcome this issue for last 3 years. It is very difficult to quit it but I have realized I get urges to watch porn when I am alone in my room or when I am stressed (or both) so I try not to be in my room alone anymore. I leave the room as soon as I get an urge to what it. When I am stressed then I read an article or a book to divert my mind.
In the end it all really depends how badly you want to quit it and how motivated are you to really quit it. Believe me, I know that it is really difficult. I am trying to quit many addictions (porn, fa,cigarette,coffe and alcohol) by May end.
February 7, 2018 at 11:45 am #191305CarpeDiemParticipantHi Corticality,
You and I are in the same boat. I didnt date my ex for 8 years like you did but I really really loved (or still love) her after we broke up. She just told me few days ago that she has no feelings for me. I got to know that he is coming back to the city where I live for a while and I texted her (we are in touch but only because she knows that I was going through depression and loneliness).
I think I am still depressed but to some lesser extent. I really don’t know what advice I can give you but what really helped me a bit is to be aware that it is over and it is probably a done deal. She will never come back. I cried a lot…a lot really which I feel helped at some level. I am focusing on other things like exercising, slowly trying to meet new people ( I used to love meeting new people), focusing to improve myself. Maybe you always wanted to reduce your coffee or quit smoking or take up a new hobby.
What Mark said is really correct. You can start writing a journal of what mistakes you did which you can try not to repeat again.Keep writing every time you feel down…we are here for you
- This reply was modified 6 years, 8 months ago by CarpeDiem.
January 24, 2018 at 8:59 am #188589CarpeDiemParticipantI would like to follow this post…I wasn’t aware before that anger is linked with depression. I have never been formally termed depressed but I do feel really sad for last 8 months…I have always been angry since I was 19 years old….
If I cant see a therapist at the moment, I dont know if there are 12 program steps here in Italy, how can I self heal? or self treat?Looking4hope – I am going through the same issue like yours, my ex doesn’t want to be together with me now when I really am trying super hard to be a better person. I guess we should collect whatever we have left of ourselves and work towards self improvement and towards a better future 🙂
January 16, 2018 at 8:50 am #187027CarpeDiemParticipantAbsolutely
I agree. Anita and Eliana are really here to help people out…I am amazed by their help 🙂January 16, 2018 at 5:42 am #186983CarpeDiemParticipantHey Sarah
I am sorry it is over like this but I guess maybe it is for the best. I am sure you will eventually realize too that it was for good that it is over.Try to write this down of whatever he did to you in a journal and read it every time you miss him, it will work as a reminder that he wasn’t meant for you. Also, eventually try to truly forgive him for what he did to you…this will really help you to move on.
Try reading the blog of ‘letting it go’ here. I think it is great.January 16, 2018 at 5:38 am #186981CarpeDiemParticipantAgreed with Inky
besides that you can take some steps to this loneliness
Meet new people and make right friends who actually care for you…January 16, 2018 at 5:36 am #186979CarpeDiemParticipantbeautiful…where is this place?
January 16, 2018 at 5:34 am #186977CarpeDiemParticipantHey Rishabh,
You are a perfect age to completely change over. I am saying this as a compliment that you are young and you do kind of have many opportunities in the future. I always say that age is just a number and I really believe in that but I feel being young has certain privileges 🙂
That being said, you can work on yourself to become more extrovert so that you can meet new people. Meet travelers if you can, host someone or attend events in your city
Focus on your studies when you are at home this way you will be more efficient
If your friends do not call, then you can call them and ask them to meet or have a tea or a beer
When you feel lonely or depressed, ask yourself if you are really something to change that situation or just complaining about it..I know many times we do something about it and we do not get the result like we wanted. I remember you posted something about your ex gf and how you missed her
Maybe go to a gym or work out at home if you cant afford
Go for a jog
Read new books
Or watch a tv series ( it will take your mind off for sometimes but not all the time)I know how you feel, I am going through kind of same phase but please don’t lose hope and keep on trying, you never know…
January 16, 2018 at 2:17 am #186957CarpeDiemParticipantDear Eliana,
Unfortunately I wouldn’t know where you can find Ayurveda’s store in Ohio. I live in Europe currently. I don’t remember if you wrote before, but have you tried Yoga before? It helped me a lot before. Sometimes when we are stressed too much, our body doesn’t function well. Give it a try, you can do it also at home by watching some videos on youtube
January 15, 2018 at 11:48 am #186845CarpeDiemParticipantDear Eliana,
Have you tried Ayuerveda yet? I know you have money issues but maybe some natural treatments might help you. I am not at all expert on this field but I really want you to recover from it. It must be really tough to live in health condition like this.
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