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December 1, 2016 at 2:17 am #121651BevParticipant
Dude – I hear you. I recognise a place I have been. Do NOT suicide. I am telling you – as a person who has been where you are now – there is a life for yourself in your future where what you are feeling now will be just a memory – but you desperately need help, and you might not be in a fit state to source it for yourself.
It’s flat-out serious depression Dude. Don’t mess with it, don’t try to “fix it” yourself. There is no shame, there is no blame, there is no embarrassment – just get your butt into a doctor’s office STAT and do not leave until they give you a treatment plan. It you don’t have the energy to tackle this or feel there’s no point because it won’t work anyway then that’s the truly evil thing about frigging depression – it stops you from caring enough to beat it.
Please confide in someone you trust – a mother, a brother, a friend, a boss and ask them to go with you. Ask them to help you tackle it because you don’t have the energy or the interest or the belief – but you just know that if you don’t you might die.
Dredge down deep inside yourself and find that tiny nugget of truth that tells you the way you’re feeling isn’t the way human beings are meant to feel and then you hold onto that truth like a talisman until you are well again. And you CAN become well again, but please reach out to a friend to ask for help reaching out to a professional. No one should live one more day feeling the way you do, but the answer is in using the quickest path to wellness, NOT in suicide.
- This reply was modified 7 years, 11 months ago by Bev.
December 1, 2016 at 1:30 am #121647BevParticipantHi Chris
When you feel the knot, rather than rejecting it or fearing it – consider accepting it. Hello old knot – you pain in the arse – you are back. I see you, I accept you are there, but you no longer define me. While you are not helpful and I don’t enjoy your presence, you remind me of who I don’t want to be anymore.
I know my past, but my past is not my future. Who I WAS then is not who I am now. Who I am NOW is the embryo of who I will be tomorrow.
In acceptance of your past – what you cannot change – you will find your peace. With attrition and in helping others, you will find hope. It’s not about re-balancing the scales and having to do as much “good” for others to balance the “bad” done previously, but it’s about you discovering and embracing the “new you” which is shedding the no-longer-required skin of the old you.
Today, I, Chris, made a small but positive difference in another human being’s life, and for today that is enough. Tomorrow I will worry about tomorrow, and about being the person I need to be tomorrow.
Be patient – peace takes time. As you trust yourself and the new you, the old you will lose power. Good luck.
December 1, 2016 at 1:10 am #121643BevParticipantHi Raquel – two of the most valuable sources of business are “repeat” and “referral”. I certainly wouldn’t rule out the direct mail approach to kick things off, but the most valuable marketing tools you have are the people seated at your restaurant tables right now. Don’t be afraid to head out there and introduce yourself, ask for feedback, ask if there is anything which might improve their experience. When people are happy, they talk. Social media let’s them reach way more people than ever before. It’s a balance obviously – you don’t want to be intrusive, but a “Hi – I’m Raquel the owner. I just wanted to check if you’re happy with everything here tonight. If people are responsive, then ask for feedback, input, suggestions “do you think that dish would work as well with chicken as with pork” makes people feel their opinions are valued, and it’s not just about their money. Then when they’re leaving, “thanks for coming here tonight – please let your friends know we’re here if you think they might enjoy us as well”. Then if the original people come back – “well HELLO! It’s so nice to see you again!! We have a special table for our regular customers…come on in!!!”
If you’ve been in restaurants before you probably think all this stuff is obvious, but people feel good to know they matter. There’s nothing better for them than saying to a friend “oh you should go to ****. I know the owner Raquel and she’s just lovely, and the food’s pretty good too.”
Anyway – just some input. Hope it helps, and good luck with your restaurant. 🙂
- This reply was modified 7 years, 11 months ago by Bev.
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