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BohemianZen

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  • #73283
    BohemianZen
    Participant

    Hi Parth,

    I’m glad you had time to watch the video and that it helped you, sound like you are starting your healing journey and that’s great.
    Definitely is better not to react and ignore those abusers (emotional vampires) sometimes is easier than others but is worth it for your own good, hopefully your mum and sister will follow you in their journeys too.

    reach out with your story to those you trust and support you, find counselling if need to, is good to have tools internal to protect yourself from that kind of people.

    again I wish you all the best!

    #72694
    BohemianZen
    Participant

    Dear Parth,

    Great to hear let me know what do your opinion about the video.

    Best wishes!

    #72662
    BohemianZen
    Participant

    Hey Parth,

    the way you are feeling is is normal for the situation you and your mom and sister are suffering, is great from you that you acknowledge how feel and that you want to get better. Your relatives sound a lot like my narcissist siblings, father and relatives on my dad’s side.
    They still if they have the chance pick on me and my mum and with time if given any chance they get worst, so is important that you have realised that they are who they are, and so you can start keeping your distance they don’t change and hopefully also your mum starts to keeping her distance for her and your little sister’s sake.

    Therapy and have someone to talk to it is quiet beneficial,you could be ptsd, that kind of abuse (emotional abuse) is very hard to fight at first mostly because you don’t have physical scars to prove it, but the damage can be as bad or even worst than physical abuse.

    The guy of the link above has help me a lot to understand what was happening to me and to take safety measures. I hope you can find it helpful too.

    And I wish you all the best for you and your family (I mean your mum and your little sister)

    #72131
    BohemianZen
    Participant

    Hi Dee,
    In your story I can see similarities with my story.
    I’ve been in a very opening healing journey for the past 4 years and things get better, it is a very painful process but it is definitely worth it. So I would like to share my opinion about your situation.

    You should consider your relationship with your parents if is not healthy not matter the fact they are your parents have not right to treat you the way they do, listen to your feelings, to your body and trust it if doesn’t feel right you should stop contact with them even if is temporarily to focus on your own recovery. Ask yourself if is healthy for your daughter to have her grandparents around, ask if those people who have treated you so badly and seem to not have remorse or regret about it are safe to be around her.

    start seeing yourself from a compassionate point of view, of course we all make mistakes, those like us trained to take care or ourselves without being able to count on our caregivers tend to beat ourselves up a lot, unconditional self-love and compassion is necessary to start to heal.

    Your wife seems like someone who supports you, you don’t own nothing to your birth family love is not a privilege is a right

    I tried Cognitive Behavioural Therapy which help me a lot, and I like experimenting with holistic therapies, and get inspired by writers, speakers and so on, in my case my two favourites at the moment are Paulo Coelho, and Alejandro Jodorowsky, the second one advices practices that are symbolic and that help a lot, like for example: on a piece of paper write all the negative things that people of influence in your life told you, then burnt the paper and then cover yourself with the ashes while you say ” I transform this curses into blessings, I will develop all my possibilities and I will be triumphant, I will love and I will be loved, I bless my authentic self” well that just and idea and my translation to his words hehe.
    The ways to heal are infinite so don’t give up!, I wish you the best so you unfold the live you truly want and deserve.

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