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Anouska

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    Anouska
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    I’ve been in a somewhat similar ambiguous situation with a same-sex friend, except that in my case, my friend was married. However she said she wanted to leave her husband for me, but at the same time said she wanted to also go on dating other guys, perhaps perceiving that I’d be more willing for that sort of an arrangement than her husband was. In the end I realised she just wanted to have her cake and eat it too, and I think you may be heading towards the same conclusion. It doesn’t make the other person any less warm or supportive, it’s just that they are also selfish in that respect. It is up to you, and only you, to set the limits and think about what you’re comfortable with. What is the relationship you want? Can this other person, no matter how lovely and warm, provide you with that relationship? If not, then sorry to say, but moving on is your best bet. Your (girl)friend may be hurt by your decision, but which one is better – for her to be hurt by a decision she has ultimately made, or for you to be hurt by it?

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