fbpx
Menu

Belle

Forum Replies Created

Viewing 2 posts - 1 through 2 (of 2 total)
  • Author
    Posts
  • May 15, 2018 at 8:27 am #207455
    Belle
    Participant

    Dear Inky,

    I think because I never got closure from Kyle. Why he did the things he did, said the things he said. Answers i will never know. I feel a lot the way i did with Kyle like i do Jason. I was weak, and vulnerable. It doesn’t excuse my decisions and i accept responsibility for the mess i have created.

    I am so made at Jason, for being everything Kyle was. They both knew one another. I didn’t expect it to be this way, Jason is 26 years older, i wrongly assumed he would be more mature in love, and my feelings. He was married for 17 years. So i find it so difficult to believe his persona of hundreds of women. He claimed it to be true for so long i couldn’t cope. Then confessed out of nowhere, all his insecurities, his fears and why he fabricated a life that is not true.

    Yet, becomes so defensive regarding it, regarding the woman in Thailand. It makes me doubt if any of its true, or a cover story.. i really just am lost in all this.

    Thank you for replying Inky, and thank you for taking the time to read this.

    May 15, 2018 at 8:21 am #207451
    Belle
    Participant

    Dear Anita,

    thank you so much for your response. I do understand your post, i believe you to be right. I think one of the factors to why i have become this obsessed is due to my past relationships. I have been around men like Jason for a long time, been brought up in that environment. Of both men, and woman, taking their insecurities out on one another. I too, have been in the pitfall of this behavior.

    But i cant decipher it no more.. its becoming increasing difficult as i constant go back and fourth my own mind doubting the reality. Its why i am seeking an outsiders perspective. Maybe i am too close to see the truth?

    Is this man truly so weak and insecure within himself, even at 50, that he has had to fabricate a whole life, speaking of hundreds of women? or is he really this way?

    I feel cheated and betrayed by his meaningless fling with the lady in Thailand, but should i be? surely no.. he had no commitment to me, no obligation, we wasn’t together. why after a year do i feel so cheated and jealous of this?

    my head is just an absolute mess, it should not have built up to the extent it has. But i cant let up.. let go.. move on.. because everything is unanswered.

    i hope this makes sense. Again, thank you for taking the time to reply.

  • Author
    Posts
Viewing 2 posts - 1 through 2 (of 2 total)