Hello Ramy, thank you for sharing your story. What a brave of you. I’m glad also that you have realization and I’m sure whatever you are facing now you can get through it. Good luck!
I am thankful today that I woke up and see my family around and have jobs. I am always thankful for the blessing that come along the way and more blessing.
Try to find way to connect with her and give a piece of advice about your crazy experience that was just a temporary happiness and never go back that vices again.
It’s simply you didn’t get what you want to be but also learn to know that we don’t have a perfect life. what you are know is a result of who you are. Sometimes we need to learn the value of satisfaction.
Leave him! He does not respect you as a woman and as a wife. You should a legal council in your situation. You must be needed help and you need to burst out what you feel.