Thank you for your well thought out reply Anita.

No, his parents haven’t given me any reason to fear being undermined. But I obviously know that they were dead against our marriage and took such harsh measures to get him married off and keep us apart. So, in matters related to them, I always assume the worst cause I don’t think I’ve fully forgiven them for their behavior.

It’s reassuring to hear that what my husband did was no easy feat. It makes me value it much much more. I guess not fully grasping the cultural piece (even though I’m trying!), prevents me from seeing his actions for the heroism they hold.

I guess the only lingering fear I have is that is it possible for him to get caught up with trying to get his parents favor and approval in other matters of our life that he then has a tough time standing up to them in the future? Like about how to raise the kids, or whether or not his parents will live with us in the future. Or as our bond grows, will his ability to stand up to them more and more grow too?

Thank you Anita!
Yes, they are ok with us getting married now. They are being supportive and have definitely changed.
But how do I stop picturing him with her? Especially since some of that stuff happened while WE were still together. For example, he took engagement photos with her (that he claims were just poses for the camera) where he kissed her on the forehead. How could he do that and then come to my place and act all normal, make out with me, etc.
I agree that he is an exceptional young man, and this is now my issues cause I chose to take him back and forgive him. But any strategies or suggestions you have would be much appreciated!