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HippieChick

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  • January 13, 2016 at 8:22 pm in reply to: Need coping/distraction ideas from slightly obsessive thoughts #92466
    HippieChick
    Participant

    Thank you so much. That is also great advice. It can be difficult to pull my emotional response out of the situation but I definitely need to work on it. I decided today that I’m going to “start over” in my own mind and just let go and trust him. Fully. I’ve got a plan in place using some of the techniques you guys have suggested and some other things I’ve read and learned. There’s really no point in being in a relationship if I’m going to constantly put us both in the uncomfortable position of preemptively accusing him if things he’s not even doing. So, thanks again to all of you. 🙂

    January 12, 2016 at 6:12 am in reply to: Need coping/distraction ideas from slightly obsessive thoughts #92207
    HippieChick
    Participant

    That sounds like a great idea. Almost like a mantra. I’ll definitely try it. It has to be better than what I’m doing! Thank you so much ď

    January 11, 2016 at 6:33 pm in reply to: Need coping/distraction ideas from slightly obsessive thoughts #92147
    HippieChick
    Participant

    I relate 100% to what you just described!

    January 11, 2016 at 4:09 am in reply to: Need coping/distraction ideas from slightly obsessive thoughts #92099
    HippieChick
    Participant

    Thank you! I actually do this when I can. And he’s very understanding and doesn’t even hesitate to explain exactly what he meant. Occasionally I seem to obsess over an offhand comment hours later, especially when I’m bored out don’t have anything to do -when I’m driving or during a lull at work, and I have no way to clarify. I’m trying to think of a way to put those thoughts away and either deal with them at an appropriate time or let them go completely. (They’re usually very minor).

    It’s not a problem when it comes to people that are not “important” to me, if that makes sense. I don’t worry about things a cashier at the grocery store might say for example.

    January 10, 2016 at 6:15 pm in reply to: Need coping/distraction ideas from slightly obsessive thoughts #92018
    HippieChick
    Participant

    Thank you so much for the advice. I completely recognized when and what happens to set me off. My main problem is stopping the slippery slope of negative thoughts that make me feel unhappy and negative toward him for no reason. I’m looking for a way to redirect or STOP that train of thoughts!

    December 30, 2015 at 3:59 am in reply to: Is this the end of a friendship? #90903
    HippieChick
    Participant

    Is it possible that he’s “pushing you away” because he realized during your relationship crisis that he wants much more than a friendship? It’s possible that he feels he can no longer be so close to someone he has romantic feelings for if there’s no chance he can be with her. Maybe he even felt like you had some interest in him as well (not your “fault”) because you tended to turn to him about troubles in your life, especially your relationship.

    Just my first thought. It’s difficult to lose a friend without an explanation but if you’re truly happy with your husband and your life at this point it may be better to step back and allow things to happen as they happen.

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