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Jish

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    Jish
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    hi my dear indian girl,

    This is an Indian guy, I had similar issues with my parents. They failed to understand sensitive issues of me in childhood. I went on depression. I tried to make them understand through out my 25 years of age. Since i was not having a good parental guidance i failed to have good friendship . I dint had any siblings, relatives or i dint have any grand parents. Life was terribly alone. I came to USA all alone and with all depression i managed to act happy in society and also performed well in academics. But my loneliness followed. Still my parents were same. I lost trust like you to have any good friendship or relationship. Many good friends approached to bond . I simply refused because of insecurity and left myself alone. But deep inside i wanted to submit myself to someone. As i have never experienced as a child to mother or a son to my father or any sort of bond to anyone. My heart was bleeding.
    I am very spiritual and believe in God . So i always talk with God. Once a thought stroked up in my mind. If i have a kid and if i have to go out for a movie would i leave my kid with a neighbor. My answer was NO. I would wish to take care of my kid myself, Because i understand about my kid more than my neighbor. Now in my case why do i expect someone to take care of me. As I am with ME. Dont you realize we are 2 of us inside. So i understand myself and i love myself.

    Now hope you got my answer. You really dont have to submit your self to anyone. I dont mean you to stay alone. We all need someone in life but first love yourself, forgive yourself as you know better about yourself. We are just learning life. So dont regret for the “dead past” as your are wasting your present moment. Be happy. You are always there for you.

    take care…………

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