Thanks for sharing Matt.  I have been using your STOP technique and it helps. I have been listening to Gary John Bishop and it has brought a lot of clarity, particularly getting out of our heads and how a lot of our self talk are just lies we’ve told ourselves for so long that we believe them.

I look forward to learning more too.

Thank you Anita. I’m doing chores and it does help. I do need to focus on paying attention to what I am doing. Really tough to get out of my head and stop wallowing and ruminating. I keep thinking about the future we planned.

Thank you so much Anita, everything you said makes so much . I will continue to share my journey.

My understanding is that I focused all of myself on our relationship and my partner. I quit meeting my own needs and got angry with him when my needs were not met. I have paternal abandonment issues. I have trust issues and was sexualy abused at age 4.

I came between my partner and his son, his family and friends. I got jealous at the drop of a hat over nothing. I’m ashamed of the way I treated him.

Yes, I was in a similar situation about 30 years ago. I guess I assumed that I had worked through it but this recent dependence was a surprise and much more intense.