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December 9, 2017 at 2:32 pm #181255AnastasiaParticipant
It makes me feel like thatās another thing thatās changed as if he lost motivation or is that just unrealistic to expect him to keep doing? Should I not be upset about it? I want his eagerness through text too
December 9, 2017 at 2:31 pm #181253AnastasiaParticipantAnother thing, whenever plans wouldnāt need work out for us heās always make an effort to reschedule to the next day or so right away or come back to me to make plans to meet the next day . But lately he doesnāt he just says weāll have to do it another time lol and thatās it no eagerness to see me or affection
December 9, 2017 at 11:31 am #181237AnastasiaParticipantI understand. I guess every change that I noticed, even small things that he would forget or stop doing when he would consistently meant that he was losing feelings or I wasnāt getting what I deserve.
Him forgetting to say goodnight to me, him not being used to phone calls, him not expressing his eagerness to see me the way he used to but would still agree to see me and make plans…these are things I shouldnāt misinterpret as him losing feelings for me or taking me for granted right?
is it normal to not want to talk to your special partner all the time? Like should I not worry if Iām not the first thing he thinks of after everything?
I understand no one likes to be micromanaged. But itās because he never had an issue before sharing everything on his own. So I felt the sudden change, maybe itās exhausting, meant something was wrong with us.
hes also very comfortable with me so he doesnāt feel like he has to talk all the time or think of something to talk to the way he would with a person that we donāt see often. I should udnerstns thatās normal right?
how do I stop reading into his actions too much and see things for what it really is like I used to? We had a great date yesterday, and he always ends up reassuring me heās here with me and heās willing to take in all of it that we go through together. And heās been making a lot of plans with me.
I guess Iām complaining at the way we talk when we are apartlike heās not expressive of many of his thoughts and feelings through text so thatās why I desire to see him so much in person for our quality time.
if you can answer all these questions for me, it would be really reassuring and helpful. Thanks so much
December 7, 2017 at 6:09 am #180917AnastasiaParticipantHi Anita,
yes ive been trying to relax and get my thoughts under control. I need to be calm.
do you think I shouldnāt make a big deal out of if he stops saying goodnight to me? Is it wrong that I notice it as a sign hes tired of doing that like losing effort or interest? Because for me if you love someone, I would want to I wouldnāt be tired of it. Is it bad to complaim about that?
and how do you make a man chase you and be interested without being clingy? Iāve been told that Iām overly in love with him so how do I calm that. And how do I regain who I am and know that he will love me through it all
December 6, 2017 at 4:24 am #180749AnastasiaParticipantIāve been open to my friend about how I feel. And she understands but feels itās unfair to her that I donāt trust her completely and sheās hurt because she thinks or feels that I think sheās a bad person. She doesnāt want me, as her friend, to feel this kind of way about her she wants me to be comfortable and not be anxious seeing her next to my bf. Like be ok with them having small talk. But her personality is more bubbly and social in general. She says I should be ok with her expressing herself in her personality. I just donāt like my bfs reaction to her. Itās always laughter.
And yes I shouldnāt be overthinking or having thoughts take over me. Itās preventing me from being myself. So the more I cling on to my relationship or the more effort I put in, the less Iāll be satisfied bc I should let my man do that right even if it takes awhile? I just feel heās getting so used to this emotional insecure me that he might not have desire to hang with me like heās not gaining anything from it. Iāve told him how I feel these feelings and he trusts and understands Iām figuring things out. I will be myself he encourages me to just be me. He tells me he loves me all the time. Iām having a hard time adjusting to comfortable stages in our relationship.
is it normal not to have much to talk about after youāve been together for so long? I canāt sxpdct him to always find something to say to me right. That sounds unnatural. Like I should be happy in silence with him. I guess I imagine the scenarios where Iāve seen him laugh with my friend even tho it was harmless socializing. I want to make him laugh all the time with me. But if I donāt have much going on in my life he must not have anything to ask about me right. I canāt wxpect too much? I canāt expect him to be interested when thereās nothing happening to me
December 5, 2017 at 4:42 pm #180679AnastasiaParticipantHi Anita,
Well heās always grown up with sisters who are like tough like a āguys girlsā type, he hasnāt been close to many ppl who arenāt like girl girls. Iām a guess I just mean Iām the opposite of that like Iāve never dealt with a masculine man before the guys Iāve been close to in the past have always been willing to be open about their feelings but my bf isnāt so much like that. We vibe well as long as we be ourselves and speak our minds. But Iāve acted emotionally and complained a lot without understanding that Iāve put a strain on us, I feel codependent. And before al the problems heās always ask me to hangout and chill without me having to initiate, but recently I e I keep beating him to it or when he does ask me I feel like itās because Iāve complained about it but maybe I shoukd just take it and cherish it right. Idk why I feel like he just responds cause h has to and not bc he genuinely wants to tell me or share with me things with excitement. Itās iust somethingās different from the way it used to and he wants to make it work with me and heās understanding that Iām finding myself heās patient about it. Why do I keep expecting so much from him or wanting to see more and more interest when he does try to show me when he can
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