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Anastasia

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Viewing 6 posts - 1 through 6 (of 6 total)
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  • #181255
    Anastasia
    Participant

    It makes me feel like thatā€™s another thing thatā€™s changed as if he lost motivation or is that just unrealistic to expect him to keep doing? Should I not be upset about it? I want his eagerness through text too

    #181253
    Anastasia
    Participant

    Another thing, whenever plans wouldnā€™t need work out for us heā€™s always make an effort to reschedule to the next day or so right away or come back to me to make plans to meet the next day . But lately he doesnā€™t he just says weā€™ll have to do it another time lol and thatā€™s it no eagerness to see me or affection

    #181237
    Anastasia
    Participant

    I understand. I guess every change that I noticed, even small things that he would forget or stop doing when he would consistently meant that he was losing feelings or I wasnā€™t getting what I deserve.

    Him forgetting to say goodnight to me, him not being used to phone calls, him not expressing his eagerness to see me the way he used to but would still agree to see me and make plans…these are things I shouldnā€™t misinterpret as him losing feelings for me or taking me for granted right?

    is it normal to not want to talk to your special partner all the time? Like should I not worry if Iā€™m not the first thing he thinks of after everything?

    I understand no one likes to be micromanaged. But itā€™s because he never had an issue before sharing everything on his own. So I felt the sudden change, maybe itā€™s exhausting, meant something was wrong with us.

    hes also very comfortable with me so he doesnā€™t feel like he has to talk all the time or think of something to talk to the way he would with a person that we donā€™t see often. I should udnerstns thatā€™s normal right?

    how do I stop reading into his actions too much and see things for what it really is like I used to? We had a great date yesterday, and he always ends up reassuring me heā€™s here with me and heā€™s willing to take in all of it that we go through together. And heā€™s been making a lot of plans with me.

    I guess Iā€™m complaining at the way we talk when we are apartlike heā€™s not expressive of many of his thoughts and feelings through text so thatā€™s why I desire to see him so much in person for our quality time.

    if you can answer all these questions for me, it would be really reassuring and helpful. Thanks so much

     

    #180917
    Anastasia
    Participant

    Hi Anita,

    yes ive been trying to relax and get my thoughts under control. I need to be calm.

    do you think I shouldnā€™t make a big deal out of if he stops saying goodnight to me? Is it wrong that I notice it as a sign hes tired of doing that like losing effort or interest? Because for me if you love someone, I would want to I wouldnā€™t be tired of it. Is it bad to complaim about that?

     

    and how do you make a man chase you and be interested without being clingy? Iā€™ve been told that Iā€™m overly in love with him so how do I calm that. And how do I regain who I am and know that he will love me through it all

     

    #180749
    Anastasia
    Participant

    Iā€™ve been open to my friend about how I feel. And she understands but feels itā€™s unfair to her that I donā€™t trust her completely and sheā€™s hurt because she thinks or feels that I think sheā€™s a bad person. She doesnā€™t want me, as her friend, to feel this kind of way about her she wants me to be comfortable and not be anxious seeing her next to my bf. Like be ok with them having small talk. But her personality is more bubbly and social in general. She says I should be ok with her expressing herself in her personality. I just donā€™t like my bfs reaction to her. Itā€™s always laughter.

     

    And yes I shouldnā€™t be overthinking or having thoughts take over me. Itā€™s preventing me from being myself. So the more I cling on to my relationship or the more effort I put in, the less Iā€™ll be satisfied bc I should let my man do that right even if it takes awhile? I just feel heā€™s getting so used to this emotional insecure me that he might not have desire to hang with me like heā€™s not gaining anything from it. Iā€™ve told him how I feel these feelings and he trusts and understands Iā€™m figuring things out. I will be myself he encourages me to just be me. He tells me he loves me all the time. Iā€™m having a hard time adjusting to comfortable stages in our relationship.

     

    is it normal not to have much to talk about after youā€™ve been together for so long? I canā€™t sxpdct him to always find something to say to me right. That sounds unnatural. Like I should be happy in silence with him. I guess I imagine the scenarios where Iā€™ve seen him laugh with my friend even tho it was harmless socializing. I want to make him laugh all the time with me. But if I donā€™t have much going on in my life he must not have anything to ask about me right. I canā€™t wxpect too much? I canā€™t expect him to be interested when thereā€™s nothing happening to me

    #180679
    Anastasia
    Participant

    Hi Anita,

    Well heā€™s always grown up with sisters who are like tough like a ā€œguys girlsā€ type, he hasnā€™t been close to many ppl who arenā€™t like girl girls. Iā€™m a guess I just mean Iā€™m the opposite of that like Iā€™ve never dealt with a masculine man before the guys Iā€™ve been close to in the past have always been willing to be open about their feelings but my bf isnā€™t so much like that. We vibe well as long as we be ourselves and speak our minds. But Iā€™ve acted emotionally and complained a lot without understanding that Iā€™ve put a strain on us, I feel codependent. And before al the problems heā€™s always ask me to hangout and chill without me having to initiate, but recently I e I keep beating him to it or when he does ask me I feel like itā€™s because Iā€™ve complained about it but maybe I shoukd just take it and cherish it right. Idk why I feel like he just responds cause h has to and not bc he genuinely wants to tell me or share with me things with excitement. Itā€™s iust somethingā€™s different from the way it used to and he wants to make it work with me and heā€™s understanding that Iā€™m finding myself heā€™s patient about it. Why do I keep expecting so much from him or wanting to see more and more interest when he does try to show me when he can

Viewing 6 posts - 1 through 6 (of 6 total)