Hi, this is my first ever post in a forum, im struggling!

I met a guy online over 13 years ago, we live over 400 miles away from each other so I thought a relationship was a no go but we chatted and we became good friends.

Ove the years we’d lose touch, then get back in touch (several times) and in March of 2019 I found him on a dating app and sent him a message. Delighted to hear from me, we exchanged numbers (again) and messaged each other all day everyday for 6 weeks, then I went to visit him, we clicked instantly, I knew as soon as I saw him he was my one, and vice versa, wen had an amazing week, fell head over heels in love with each other, it was perfect.

We continued messaging and talking every night on the phone, he visited me for a week met my family, my 3 kids and mum said finally you’ve found a lovely man, the future, our future looked perfect, he was looking for jobs where I live, we save every week for our future, we save a little then do a little renovation in what is going to be our home, he’s sold the majority of the contents of his house ready for when he gets a job near me and he’s moving in, the future looked rosy….until last week when he accidentally sent me a nude of another woman! I was floored, asked what I was looking at, he said, im sorry, that was an accident, you should never have seen that, I downloaded a photo saving app and all my photos came up from the cloud that I’ve used since I sacred using iPhone in 2011, I thought I’d deleted everything, I would never intentionally hurt you  im so sorry, I replied, I cant talk to you right now, hung up the phone, I was numb!

The following day at work i thought of nothing else, called him when I finished and he apologised again, said please forgive me its from my past, you know how I feel about you, I love you so much, we chatted for a while I told him I could understand him having pictures of women before me, but I cant get my head round why he still had the pic when he’s so into deleting stuff he does want or need, he doesn’t even keep our conversations on text or WhatsApp, I told him I needed time, we still message all day wveryday and talk every night, but im hurt!

The pic was a snap chat and was screen shot on his new phone( I know this because he got himself an iPhone 11 in September and the time/signal layout is different from the iPhone 8 which he had previously) yes ive investigated lol this is driving me insane.

I have thought about forgiving him and moving on, but I get this wave of anger and I just want to see him face to face to ask the questions ive got, ive also thought about ending it but I don’t want to do that on the phone or a message, I believe that what we have is worth more than a shitty dear John.

I love this man so much, im 48 he’s 52, we ain’t no spring chickens! I guess i just need to hear from others, because at the moment I feel alone and slightly round the bend.

Thanks xx