Hi Chokko!

I just wanted to let you know you’re so not alone
In your fears& anxiety about death. Mine also started around 8years
old. I had two Uncles die within two months and it rocked my our old world! My parents didn’t explain death to me in a way that I found soothing or understandable. Perhaps in their grief my new found anxiety went unnoticed. But it spiraled out of control! I remember telling them ” I don’t want to die!” and ever since I’ve had an irrational overwhelming fear of death, even now after I’ve worked through my personal issues with anxiety and panic attacks, if I let myself think about death it’s never positive.
At 8 years old I went so far as unplugging EVERYTHING at night fearing we’d all die in a fire. Eventually that passed. But I have issues with driving, which I refuse to do and I’m 36! I too fear there is nothing after we die and tho I try remaining optimistic and “spiritual” I still worry about it. It’s fear of the unknown. I am at a point where I’m good with my anxiety. I have meds I take as needed. But I think things like this, especially when it interferes with your quality of daily life, need to be talked about more one on one with a therapist.
I must admit reading forums, even tho I rarely post, and seeing others who relate does help me alot!
I hope you had a wonderful holiday! Feel free to ask me anything.
Alicia