Hello girlinwonderment
The issue could be about you, or him, or both of you, or compatibility. It’s probably a bit of all of the aforementioned. 🙂
This relationship is not meeting a need that is very important to you. Whether your need springs from neediness and unresolved issues of abandonment is worth considering, but my main concern is not so much that you don’t like the situation, but that you don’t feel like you can discuss your dissatisfaction with your boyfriend. You are not genuinely relating in your relationship.
What is holding you back?
What is stopping you from opening up about your expectations?
I think it might be worthwhile talking to this man about what you are experiencing. Obviously, you will want to start with “I” statements to help prevent him from getting defensive. Even if the conversation does not end with the outcome you would like, the least you will have achieved is putting self-care into practice by honoring your inner voice. Plus, you will gain confidence that should help you handle similar situations of questioning or doubt in the future.
He may not be the right one for you, but maybe you’re a little bit curious about where he is coming from and what motivates him. It would be interesting to find out if he cares, or if he is capable of caring for you, in a way that warms your heart, body, mind, and spirit.
Best wishes
Jen