Hi Lee,

The first time he started to doubt in you, the relationship was destined to fall apart.
All I can say right now is that you should evaluate your current situation, cons and pros of this relationship.
If you thought even for a second that this relationship can harm you in any way (feeling depressed or anxious all the time), you should brake up with him immediately.
If you continue like this (asuming you feel anxious and depressed), you could develop some disorders (like OCD) which you don’t want in your life, trust me (if you already don’t have one).

Be smart, stay strong and follow your dreams.
Karlo

Dear x:

My input after reading your post:

1) Your boyfriend, when he was a baby, he was innocent and trustworthy, honest and loving. Babies and young children are born that way and part of that child stays in the adult. So you keep seeing that part in him, and you can see it- if you look- in criminals of all kinds as well. The bigger picture of who he is- is what he has become. He has become dishonest, lying, untrustworthy.

2) To trust your own evaluation of him, your own knowing what to do, what to choose to do, you don’t have to be perfect yourself, to be completely secure, perfect in your own behavior- nobody is. If you wait until you are perfect so to trust yourself to make the right choices for yourself, you will never get to that point. Everyone messes up. To err is human. You can still SEE who he is while being imperfect yourself.

3) Yes, what he did is cheating. No, you are not the one who made him cheat/ you are not responsible to his cheating. He is.

anita