Dear marki:
i am sorry for your pain. As to your question: “Am I the one not trying hard enough?” I think you ARE trying hard enough- not trying is not your problem, I think. MAybe is is in HOW you are trying. So I would examine the HOW.
I wonder if there is a way for you to get feedback from a friend who unfriended you as to the why. I don’t know if such will answer you if you asked, if he/ she will answer you honestly… feedback from a decent, mature-enough, trusted individual will help. Finding out what you put out there and what are the responses. For example if you go on and on about the same thing and you don’t listen to the other’s input… if the other feels invisible because you only do the “me, me, me” talking…. I don’t know. Investigate….find out, get information, and proceed from there.
It is like the scientific method: there is the PROBLEM, HYPOTHESIS.. then gathering information, observations, analysis. Find out…
anita