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advice please

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  • May 9, 2014 at 2:24 pm #56068
    myself
    Participant

    hi,
    i’m in a bit of a problem. I have recently became aware that i am different with different people.
    in a group of friends i’m other guy, than with an other group other friends. And then i thougt to myself ‘why?’ ?
    my conclusion is that i like having (different types) friends, and to be friends with some of them i have the urge to be different.

    Now, my question is, is there a way i can be meself anywhere? why do i do what i do? how do i find out who i really am?

    thanks and greetings from the netherlands.

    May 13, 2014 at 9:33 pm #56238
    VK
    Participant

    Hello,

    At the end of the day, friends who are similar to you or not, should be accepting of who you are, and if you don’t feel like they would accept you, then you are probably hanging around the wrong people. Most friendships involve multiple people from different backgrounds and lifestyles, and that’s the beauty of friendship. It’s boring hanging around people who are JUST like you all the time. I think you need to work on your confidence and security, because ultimately, the feeling of needing to change to fit in comes from a source of insecurity. No one on this earth is like you, don’t waste that! Be yourself, and if they don’t like it, they aren’t worth your presence anyways. Read some quotes about being yourself and see if it helps. Good luck!

    May 14, 2014 at 4:27 pm #56300
    rushlady
    Participant

    What do you do that is common to your behavior no matter who you are with? That may be a place to start. Being different in different groups or setting s is not necessarily all that bad. Finding our own themes helps us to understand and accept who we are. Plus life experiences change us. I am vastly changed from who I was 20 and 30 years ago. I advise finding what is “yours” or what is “you” at the core then accepting that which you love about yourself while changing that what you dislike. Best of luck

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