Hi Peeps,

Well, the Buddhist principles are largely ticking over nicely, but I seem to be facing a new dilemma. I suppose I should say that I’ve always been a little shy when it comes to socialising, probably due to my having grown up relatively alone – it’s something I’ve just carried to a large degree through my life (and probably formed some bad social habits because of too). This shyness doesn’t really cause me any active anxiety when I’m out and about but it does leave me feeling a certain conflict regarding my connections with people. I do wonder whether this habitual solitude pattern is a source of my inability to feel a desire for romantic relationships, though I would very much like to share and experience a close relationship again. I can be happy on my own, but certainly spend too much time in my own head and not a lot of time socialising with people I know, usually because they seem to be busy with their own lives (is this just a symptom of our relatively connected but largely crap social society?). It’s more accurate to describe my social life as someone who goes out (when he can afford it) but unless I meet with someone intentionally or accidentally, I’m more than likely just going to spend my time alone in a crowd. I seem to be missing a belief in, and sense of, connectivity with people – as I say either a lack of desire to engage with people who are there around me or (maybe more often) a lack of belief that anyone is genuinely interested in me as a person, probably because I’m having issues feeling the value of human contact, even if I can sense that I would be immensely happy to have someone to share time with. Hope that isn’t as confusing to you as it seems to be to me!? hehe.. Thoughts please..

• This topic was modified 11 years, 5 months ago by Gavin.