Hi Hyo,

I’m in a similar position to you right now. An important thing to realise is that the vast majority of people are actively dissatisfied or at best unfulfilled by the work they do. Although there have been countlees surveys verifying this, you only have to look at the faces on the train on the way to and from work to see very clear evidence of this. But most people either lack the awareness to even question the possibility of a more fulfilling career or are unwilling to sacrifice the money/time invested (seeing it as a waste) that got them to their current work or the comfort and security it provides.

Your life situation only seems behind relative to the western expectation of the way you should live your life, i.e. go to school, go to college, get a good jod, get married, have a family, etc. This is the program that most people have running in the back of their mind and if their own life doesn’t comply with it then they think something’s wrong. It helps keep them trapped in an unhappy way of life ans so blocks then from attaining fulfillment.

Everyone is looking for more fulfillment and happiness, all the above stuff doesn’t mean a thing without it. I know of plenty of people with enviable life situations (by appearance on the outside): high power jobs, great partner, family, etc, and they are miserable and/or their life is actually in a mess. It’s this delusion that there’s somewhere to GET. But it’s all one huge myth, there’s nowhere to get. I’ve read so many times that the only true fulfillment is inner fulfillment. For a long time I refused to believe it, but then I was (and still am) constantly reminded of the truth of it. Much of this inner fulfillment comes from just walking the path, i.e. the one where you march to your own drum, which you are doing!

If anything, you are ahead of most people because you are walking the true path OF happiness and fulfillment, rather than an illusory path TO happiness and fulfillment, and most people will do that their entire lives (and never get there, because there’s nowhere to get).

‘Unenlightened’ types would most likely say things like, “You can’t do that, you’d be wasting all that money, what was the point of doing your degree?” But they are missing the point completely! Life’s a journey, you change, you understand the world better as you mature, you see what’s actually important, and most of all you know yourself better. Like I said, a journey, you have to walk certain paths and have certain experiences in life, which have led you to where you are, it was all necessary, perhaps even essential to discovering what you do want to do (you are very lucky, many have no idea). Another thing, just as important as discovering what you do want to do is discovering what you don’t want to do, i.e. now you know that you don’t want to do public health, and if you hadn’t done it I’m guessing you wouldn’t have found Occupational Therapy.

The time and the money spent to get there doesn’t matter, it just seems important because that’s what everyone else is always trying to acquire more of. Don’t get caught up in this. The road YOU are on is a million times more valuable. It reminds me of the founder of the martial art of Aikido, Morihei Ueshiba, he tried his hand at a few completely different career areas, each time becoming quite successful in each area, but without hesitation dropping it once he realised it wasn’t meant for him. He certainly marched to his own drummer, and this was before the current ‘age of enlightenment’ where resources like this website make wisdom like this easily accessible to all. He created a number of bussineses and as soon as thay became successful he just handed them over to someone else and started a new project, because this is what he wanted to do, even though he could have stayed where he was and let the money pile up. Many would say (What are you doing?!!). He ultimaltely found what he was meant to do, which gave him great purpose, in training in, developing and teaching Aikido and achieved a level of mastery of both Aikido coupled with spiritual enlightenment that I doubt will ever be seen again.

Let your anxiety go, have faith!

Ben.

Dear Hyo,

Everyone has those terrible inner voices. They try to keep us safe, but actually keep us small.

And what I know for sure (having coaches lots of career changers) is that the closer we get to our dream, the louder they scream.

So perhaps it is a good sign that you are hearing these voices?

How do you deal with them? Either say ‘thanks, but I am going to do this right now because I really care about it’ directly to the voice or get right back to your passion and re-connect with what is important to you. However loud the voice is, it can never compete with the things that you love.

Devi