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- This topic has 5 replies, 5 voices, and was last updated 10 years, 4 months ago by Evelyn.
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December 22, 2013 at 3:26 pm #47363EvelynParticipant
I had a job for about two months. Then I got fired. Right after that I jumped into cosmetology school. Why? I think it’s because after I got fired from my job I had a job interview for a job that I use to have at a pharmacy. The lady interviewing me knew me. She didn’t seem too happy to see me. Admitting how she felt awkward because to her this was not a normal interview. Long story short she asked me about my life gals and I admitted I had none. At the time I just wanted to work and get some change in my pocket and see where I go from there. She made me feel bad about myself but I can’t complain. It’s true. The job is only going to pay me a little more than min. Wage and need to expand my wants. Have structure.
I dropped out college twice. I am 22. In cosmetology school now but anxiety has ruined that for me I guess. First week was fine. Then the second week I felt miserable. Couldn’t function or think. My hands would slightly shake when I’m trying to paint a nail or put in a roller. Like I love this stuff. Why is my body acting thus way why am I allowing myself to fail. Tom. I have no appointment with the principal she elieves nows not a good time to be in school because I just started and I’m already in a downward spiral so quickly…. I think I’m just going to quit. I’m embarrassed because I know how upset my parents will be. I don’t want to upset them. I don’t know why am failing at everything.
I spent the whole day in bed. I had two odd dreams. It’s 6 22 now and I feel scared I feel like I want to sleep forever. I feel pain and I don’t know why but every time I think about anything I just start to cry and wish to die. Just be gone. I don’t feel like I’m really useful or really here anyway.
- This topic was modified 10 years, 10 months ago by Evelyn.
December 22, 2013 at 10:03 pm #47401JosephParticipantEvelyn sorry to hear about your struggles. I certainly hope you continue to pursue that which makes you happy. You definitely do succeed in some things. For example getting into College and Cosmetology schools. I think it’s great you started thinking big picture.
Maybe talking to your family could help? Are they generally supportive?
You sound like you have what you need to make it but are just going through some tough times.
December 24, 2013 at 9:07 am #47513memmParticipantHey it’s okay, you’re only 22, you’re not supposed to know everything. I just turned 25 and I still don’t know exactly what my goals are either, it’s normal to try all sorts of things before you find something you really want.
Do you have somebody that you can just talk to without holding back? Like a really good friend? It seems that you are very stressed out, what do you do to relax?
I think it’s important to remember that feeling bad is normal and happens from time to time, to everyone, but it doesn’t stay that way. Talking about everything you have on your mind, or writing it down, meditating on it etc… are all very good ways of just working through all the things you’re worrying about emotionally and letting them go.
Don’t listen to the principle. Quitting won’t solve anything, but working through it will. But if you need some time off then definitely do that, maybe a few days and use them to really unwind.
December 25, 2013 at 1:04 pm #47534Anders HasselstrømParticipantDear Evelyn,
Thanks for sharing your challenges with us. After all this is one way of finding a solution. You’ve taken a major step in the right direction (Hey, you see! Success right there).
I’m at your age myself Evelyn and I know it can be a struggle to deal with life sometimes. I usually take out an hour a week to ponder about my life situation and my goals in life. Where do I want to go? How long have I come already? What are my dreams? What do I fear? and so on.
Spend some hours clearing your mind for thoughts – Write them down on a piece of paper. Ask yourself the important questions: “What would I do with my life if money was no object? What would I do with my life if I was the only one to decide? When you figure out what you have to do – You do it. Never question yourself or your dreams – Go out there and do it.
Cheers,
Anders Hasselstrøm
Motivational SpeakerDecember 26, 2013 at 3:32 pm #47613MarkParticipantHi Evelyn,
First, I am sending you light and love your way.
Second, beyond what the others have posted, I want to offer you my support and feel free to email me.
Third, it sounds like you are “locked up” in your fear and anxiety and do not have any space to really tap into your heart to know what you really want. I would think you would feel more “settled” once you decide that you just need to work at *something* until you get some routine, structure, and money to get that space to reflect and hear your heart a bit better.Metta,
Mark
mark@markwillhelp.comJuly 10, 2014 at 5:07 pm #60577EvelynParticipantThanks everyone <3
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