Home→Forums→Relationships→Trouble letting go and trusting the Universe
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May 16, 2013 at 2:48 pm #35722NancyParticipant
I’m working very hard at taking all the necessary steps to apply the Law of Attraction to my life. I understand how important it is to forgive, let go, and let the Universe do its thing. I’ve been working on letting go A LOT. It’s hard!
While I’m confident in a lot of areas of my life, I’m sorry to say my self-esteem is suffering a little from some recent relationship and dating experiences. I’m working at letting these go, but I’m having trouble with it. While my head can tell me logically that they weren’t good for me, anyway, and that I must clear out that old junk for whatever the Universe has in store, I can’t clear it out! And I really want to, as I know I’d feel much happier and more at peace if I did. This is a consistent issue with me that I’d like to work out once and for all.
Any suggestions? I’m pretty much bombarding myself with all sorts of really great books on the subject, and doing whatever I can to move forward. I can feel myself making tiny bits of progress, but I’d love to know if there are other constructive things I could be doing.
Thanks!
May 16, 2013 at 8:58 pm #35762LeeParticipantHi Nancy,
I felt compelled to reply because you see I too struggle with “letting go”. For a task that sounds so simple it is a universally challenging task, and as humans we all have difficulties letting go of one thing or another. As frustrating as the process is, understand that “letting go” is as much of an action as it is a process! It may take some time, depending on what exactly it is you are trying to let go of, and how much you allow yourself too. First and foremost, you are already making progress by understanding that forgiveness, love, trust, and understanding is key.
Whatever this “clutter”is that you speak of, find peace in knowing that YOU are in control of your thoughts, feelings, actions, and choices in this present moment. Don’t worry about the past, or the future. Let go a sigh of relief in knowing that you are only responsible for you, and that other people’s choices, words, actions are their own. Respect them, but understand you can’t control them. You are 100% in believing that the universe has a lot in store for you, it truly does. Try opening up to the endless possibilities that are in store for you–without expectations.
Just remember, there is no right way to letting go, but put that same trust you have in the universe in yourself and you will find all the answers.
I hope others may provide insight as well, but I also hope this helped a little! I know how hard letting go is…trust me when I say it is a struggle for many!
Also be sure to check out Tiny Buddha’s many articles about letting go if you haven’t already. Lori has written several on the topic, and I found it really helped me.
May 16, 2013 at 9:25 pm #35772NancyParticipantThanks so much, Lee. Your words are very encouraging.
May 17, 2013 at 7:51 am #35794AnonymousInactiveI also struggle with this concept. What does letting go look like? Who has done it already? How would I recognize it if I saw it? I know I get hooked often by people, ideas, feelings, and thoughts. If I didn’t get hooked, would that mean I have truly let go?
Should I have no goals, no needs, no desires, no preconceived notions, no expectations? Is that letting go?
Most recently, I’m struggling with boredom and loneliness. I date, have relationships, go out with friends, connect with family, go to work, chat with colleagues, journal, read, meditate, travel, learn new things, and yet all of this seems unfulfilling and superficial. The moment I find myself satiated with something or someone, I want more and I know I’ll never be satisfied. The moment I find myself alone with nothing to do, I’m once again looking for something or someone to connect with. I don’t feel like there’s been any growth or development.
The phrase “let go” comes to mind often, but what does that even mean in practice?
Trusting the universe is another strange concept. What does that look like and why should I trust the universe? Who is the universe, what is telling me to do, and what has it done to gain my trust?
Sometimes, I feel like the solution would be to connect with something greater than myself. Greater than all the little insignificant day to day ups and down and minutia of life which I recognize, in a million years, will mean absolutely diddly squat. Is that something the universe?
I meditate on my own insignificance in the grander scheme of things which I think will help me let go. The feelings and thoughts I experience are impermanent. They flow and change from day to day and the only place they exist is in the mind. The moment I die and my mind stops, those feelings and thoughts will go with it. Eventually, even by my friends and family, my mistakes and even my accomplishments will be forgotten like the millions of other human beings who have come before me as this little blue marble we call Earth spins around and around and around in the vast emptiness of space.
If there are others who struggle with these thoughts and feelings, I’d love to hear more stories.
May 17, 2013 at 10:04 am #35799ErinParticipantI can relate to each of you. My greatest struggle is to just “be”. Letting things come into my life with a purpose and leave with a meaning; without overthinking things and “letting go” when those “things” are no longer needed.
May 17, 2013 at 10:33 am #35800CsabaParticipantI can truly relate to that. I have been questioning the meaning of life nowadays and I just can’t create with the thought that no matter how great it is, it will just turn to dust one day like anything else, it kills my creativity. My biggest fear is that there are two possible answers:
1. There is a purpose to living, we come here to learn and there is a higher power that somehow protects us. This theory gives me some sort of comfort but I can’t just blindly believe it because there is a much scarier alternative that:
2. There is no higher power, the universe is infinite and because it is: no matter how slight the chance is for us humans to appear we did because we could, because everything could happen if the universe is infinite. But this just scares me because this means that we have no purpose whatsoever. It means that well die one day and nothing has changed.
Has anybody fought with these kind of thoughts nowadays?
May 22, 2013 at 4:35 pm #36015SkywalkParticipantHi I’m new on TB, but I’d like to advise and comment to Nancy’s original comment as I have suffered in the past with the same issues about letting go.
I think its a situation of over analyzing, which in fairness we all do, its very hard to put into practice the law of allowing, especially if we have had a rough ride, we want instant relief, we want answers now. So, we spend more time reading and meditating and asking again for what we want, which in many ways can hamper us, because we are asking the same questions over and over and not living the moment, but living the past, because its a question we’ve already asked.
Look at it this way. If you plant a seed you don’t keep digging it up to see how it is progressing do you? You just let it be, knowing it will bloom one day. This is the best analogy I’ve heard yet on the LOA and you think Id have it down, I still slip up with that one, but the analogy is perfect and can you imagine if we treated every facet of our lives like we did a planted seed? We’d have no worries! 🙂
My advice is this. Ask your questions on forums, read books, meditate and then take a break from it all and go and do something for yourself that takes you out of the questioning portion.
During the break I used to place a rubber band on my wrist, and stretch it back so it would snap my wrist if I had a wandering thought about the past that could hamper me.
Go forth ask for advice, and ask for what you truly want, then like the seed leave it be, and get back to life.
Sometimes you have to live the question before you get the answer.
Good Luck!
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