Thank you for sharing your story. First of all, you are NOT a horrible person! You were unhappy with your relationship, she was not treating you with respect, so you ended it which was the right thing to do. Ending a relationship doesn’t make you a bad person, and you are not obligated to stick with someone who hurts you.

I’m sorry that this happened to you and I can relate, I was also super shy at your age and never found the courage to ask out anyone I liked until I was in my late 20s! Going through what you went through would have devastated me, but I also know that eventually I would heal. Take time to recover from this; do the things and hobbies that you love, spend time with family and friends who genuinely care about you. And most of all, be kind to yourself! We all make mistakes, that’s what makes us human, and the best thing to do from mistakes is to learn from them.

You are a compassionate human being. May be, your ex-girlfriend had some issues which she wasn’t openly communicating. So, someday she seemed pretty normal and other time she was full of agony. You did what’s healthy for you. All the best for a great future life ahead!

Of course not. You are learning like the rest of us. Forgive yourself first for making a mistake. When you didn’t go after her when you met her at first it was your spirit holding you back. I felt deep inside you knew she wasn’t the right one for you. Yet you went against you own gut feeling, and said you were shy. Whenever you were talking to her things seem okay, yet you couldn’t shake the feelings that something was just not right. Every interaction is a learning experience.

First, this person seems very hurt lost and has a host of issues. Somewhere inside of you, you feel you are responsible. Everyone is totally responsible for their own happiness. That is what I got from this, it was to show you that no matter what you did it wasn’t enough or right or this or that. You can add to someone’s joy but if they aren’t happy with themselves how can they be happy with you. So my question to you is where in your life before your first girlfriend did anyone make you feel you weren’t enough? They made you feel you just can’t do anything right, etc. Whoever or whatever the issue don’t deny the pain feel it all breath if you feel angry get to the hurt and disappointment, feel it identify it, be honest about your feeling and let it go. Feel the pain, cry, write about it journal. Give yourself time and space to let go of other people’s expectations of you. You cannot please everyone, yet you picked up her issues and made them yours. So if you are feeling, horrible, guilty, admit it, feel the pain. You can cry anywhere you are safe to release the guilt and labels she gave you. Take the time you need to let it go.

Remember she was hurt and it’s really about her pain that she has to deal with, that she doesn’t know how yet. It’s a journey that she will have to take to clear her hurt.

The next time you are interested in someone and are hesitant, take your time. See how they get along with everyone. Also find out what there expectations are in a relationship. Also your parent’s experiences are yours, you will have your own experiences that are unique to you.

Dear Csaba,
We all just human who want to love and to be loved. And no! YOU ARE NOT HORRIBLE PERSON. You shouldn’t be sorry for breaking up with her, you should be proud of yourself because u r brave enough to stand up for yourself, to admit that you weren’t unhappy with the relationship no matter how much you hearted this person and did the right thing,

We learn to live when we learn to love, and what you experienced is a lesson of life. We are young, darling and life sometimes put people on our path so we can learn the lessons. And you shouldnt blame yourself for what happened because we are responsible for ourselves, for our own happiness and I believe she acted that way because she wasnt happy herself and she put it on you to ease her bitterness and like Annette said, she needs to figure out herself to deal with her anger and bitterness. Life is beautiful, and we can always get love and comopassion from people around us, family and friends.