Dear Christiana Moore:

The “right parenting style” is about calm. The most important thing for a child is to know that her parent is calm and in control. This means that you need to act as calm as you can be, on an ongoing, regular basis, no hysterics, no drama in front of her. When she cries, comfort her with your empathy and physical touch. If she misbehaves, instruct her how to behave instead, show her specifically the acceptable behavior you expect her to choose next time, in a similar circumstance.

Regarding “generational curses, cycles, and trauma”- she will be affected by those, if not yours then other people’s as she grows up and interacts with others. Again, the best thing you can do for her is to be calm around her on a regular basis. Your calm will become her calm as she comes to more and more contact with our troubled world outside her home.

anita

Dear Christiana Moore:

You are very welcome. Your daughter’s life is not likely to be easy simply because we don’t live in a world that makes an easy life possible. What you can do for her is to give her empathy and calm, so that she will be better able to endure future difficulties and make wise choices when facing those difficulties.

Post again anytime you want to.

anita