Similar hun, similar but not quite the same. I don’t know the answer as I am screwed up big time and am searching for answers my self. Sometimes I think i’d be better off living alone with a dog. But, love is a strange thing and I doubt anyone ever has fully understood its complexities, why do we fall for those who hurt us and cant let go.

Dear leanna,

You have a lot of expectations that you’ve developed through developing strong emotions for this person who have GHOSTED you for five months, then came waltzing back into your life, asking for a second chance to which you willingly gave it to him just because you still have not let go of your feelings for him. Those expectations did not (is not) helping you.

Just because you have feelings for that person, you’d let those emotions cloud your judgment of a person that had the audacity to ghost you in the first. A person who, after several meetings, decided that you were a waste of his time and so did not contact you because he didn’t want to take responsibility for rejecting you, even through text. He is a an *ss for ghosting you, but you also take part of the blame because you willingly let him into your life the second time.

The person in question only texted you for whatever reasons, but you did not have to accept his invitations. You could have unfollow his instagram, ignore his text and any messages that he sent you. But you did not. You continue pining for this person who have shown himself to be immature then accepted his invite a YEAR after little contact. For some reason, you did not give up the hope and expectations that if he’d only take the time to get to know you, then he would see what an awesome person you are and would want to start dating. But reality is harsh in that it rarely follow the stories written and directed by you. And those stories tend to contain certain expectations that does not help you when it comes to the action of other people because you cannot control their actions to begin with. You can only control your own behavior.

You allow his questionable behavior so it’s not all his fault. He only did what he wanted and you did what you wanted, which was to accept his invite and go on dates with him, even after the ghosting and a year of no contact. So rather than question his behavior, ask yourself why you would allow that sort of behavior in the first place.