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Making the first move

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  • November 25, 2018 at 8:11 am #248447
    Claire
    Participant

    I’m a 21 year old female who has had little dating experience, but still know what type of guy I am looking for. By that I mean character wise ?. There’s this guy I have followed on instagram for a while who I really find … I guess for lack of a better word “appealing” haha and I really want to talk to him but I’m scared about making the first move or if I even should. I know even if things don’t go anywhere that that’s simply part of life… but I’m still unsure if I should go for it. Although I feel like if I don’t try I’ll never even have a chance. Like the expression “you can’t even hope to win the race if you don’t enter it”. So should I? Thank you so much for anyone who helps me ??

    November 25, 2018 at 9:48 am #248475
    talah
    Participant

    Hello Claire,

    It’s okay if you are unsure about what type of guy you are looking for, you are 21 and have a lot to live for. Life is about taking chances and risks even though you may not get the outcome you expected, you will later on ask yourself  ”what if?” if you do not take the chance. This guy has no idea how you are feeling, don’t be afraid to make the first move, you never know what could happen. You may just turn out to be just friends or just strangers that once spoke and that’s okay. If you want changes in your life, you should always step out of your comfort zone.

    P.S I met my boyfriend online who became my best friend then my boyfriend, we have been together just over a year aha. My point is, take the chance as you never know where life takes you.

    November 25, 2018 at 12:18 pm #248517
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Claire:

    If I was you, and if I wanted to get to  know the guy better, then I would make the first move, messaging the  guy that I find  him appealing and would like to get to know him better. Then I will wait for his move, if there is none, it is done. If there is a reply, I will evaluate the reply. If the reply will be about getting  together for a casual encounter, I would reject  his move because my goal would be to get to know him better, not to have a casual encounter.

    If on the other hand he responds  with a suggestion to  communicate online and/ or in  person for the purpose  of getting to know each other, then I would proceed and communicate, take it slow, get to  know each other  and  decide later if you a relationship is  a good idea or not.

    anita

    November 26, 2018 at 2:41 pm #248681
    Claire
    Participant

    Thank you both so much for giving me positive encouragement! It feels almost impossible to come by these days. I’m just waiting patiently to see how things work out.

    November 27, 2018 at 7:09 am #253959
    Anonymous
    Guest

    You are welcome, Claire. Post again anytime.

    anita

    November 27, 2018 at 7:24 am #254501
    talah
    Participant

    No problem <3

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